How This Could Be Bendigo’s Brexit Will Scare You

By on October 21, 2016
A quokka meeting.

It has recently come to my attention that Bendigo has an international reputation.

It’s not for gold mines, or a shit-long dragon.

Nor for the giant Buddhist Stupa or the massive Christian Cathedral.

It’s not even for Claude.

It’s because of the Anti-Mosque rallies.

Annoying isn’t it?

Even with such a nice garden next to a mosquito infested creek, world news only attend Bendigo when there are riots about building a religious place.

They didn’t come have a look at the Sikh temple plans or the national Quaker meeting.

Violence and disharmony lead the news.

But hey, locally we came out of it okay.

We banded together, ducked and covered, said “I really don’t care,” and a few people replaced black balloons with yellow ones.

We’ve moved on.

It’s all in our past.

Right?

Sorry, but no.

This council election is going to dig at those wounds like a dog without a lamp shade around its neck.

This is because the anti-mosque group… group?… no, let’s call them a clan.

Yes, a clan of anti-mosquers sounds about right.

Despite the anti-mosque clan losing all their legal appeals they have found a loophole.

All eight of them are running for council, and not really telling anyone.

None of the ballot papers will identify the Klan… sorry… clan members.

Instead they say things like “hold council accountable” and promise to be an “independent voice” and worst of all that they’ll uphold “Australian values”.

Australian values!

Bull-crap.

To me Australian values is watching a soccer game played on a cricket field that’s been built for Aussie Rules.

It’s cooking dim sims on the barbie.

It’s having dim sims instead of dim sum.

It’s paying a mate for work in slabs of beer.

It’s multicultural diversity, and it’s forever changing.

What make’s them think they stand for Australian vales?

Who got to choose?

For over two-hundred years Muslims lived in Australia without a bother.

Then some numb-nut is a fuck-stick and this clan of anti-mosquers want them all to leave.

For over two-thousand years Aboriginals lived in Australia without a bother.

Then some white folks arrived and proceeded to kill everyone and take the land.

Has anyone asked the Aboriginals what they think Australian values are?

Does anyone want a kick in the nuts?

Look, honestly, thank you for reading this far.

It’s their selfishness that makes me mad.

Along with the deception and exclusion, and other stuff.

They smell bad too.

All I ask is this.

If you haven’t voted, please be aware of who you are voting for.

It would be very embarrassing if Spanish news come back to ask why we voted for Klan… sorry, clan members.

Answering that we were mislead is not an excuse.

For more on your candidates please read: https://bendigocouncilelections.wordpress.com/

 

All items on this website are fictitious. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental or is intended purely as a satire, parody or spoof.

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