3 Injured In Lightsaber and Nunchuck Fight

By on June 7, 2016
The 3rd Unknown Brother Who Just Saw The New Ninja Turtles Movie

3 Kangaroo Flat men have been arrested by Police this morning and charged with attempted murder after injuring each other with Star Wars lightsabers and a nunchuck.

The three unnamed men aged 26, 28 and 29 were fighting over who was going to be Luke Skywalker when one of the men accidentally cut his brother’s arm off. The second brother retaliated and cut his brother’s leg off while quoting “It’s just a flesh wound” from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

“We bought the Lightsabers from eBay. How were we to know it was gonna hurt someone?”

The third unnamed brother just arrived home from an advanced screening of the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie and used a nunchuck to break up the fight accidentally hitting himself in the right testicle.

The two men’s mother Stephanie Braine came home from work to find both of their sons passed out in their backyard and quickly called an Ambulance. “It looks like the Red Wedding scene from Game Of Thrones” she said.

This is the 4th spate of Lightsaber accidents in the past 2 weeks. The ACCC handed down its findings and is requesting that the government either initiate a lightsaber buy back scheme or make it mandatory for Lightsabers to have a marshmallow stuck to the end of all Lightsabers real or not.

The three men are expected to make a full recovery and return to their jobs working for the Long Gully Parks Department.

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