Ancient Well Re-Opening Overshadowed By New Wellbeing Centre

By on November 3, 2018

With the grand opening of the Gurri Wanyarra Wellbeing Centre this weekend past, it would be easy to overlook a similarly momentous occasion in our rich history; the grand re-opening of Bendigo’s ancient well.

The ancient well had been closed late last year, with reports citing ‘strange gurgling sounds’ and ‘loud but distant screeches’ emanating from the cistern that lie below.

“Screeching? We didn’t hear any screeching..” three council officials stated eerily, in unison; their heads shaking slowly and deliberately from side to side. One official even went on to say that the cistern itself never even existed; “There is no ancient cistern at the bottom of the ancient well,” they said. “Do not go down into the ancient well, it is closed.”

The ancient well has been an important part of the tapestry of Bendigo since it’s discovery by the council some decades ago, and despite the fact that the council has never disclosed the location of the well to anyone, they assured us that the re-opening ceremony (which is traditionally conducted at exactly 2:03AM) was a roaring success.

“The ancient well will provide us with the secret knowledge for years to come,” one spokeswoman told us, un-blinking in her resolve.

“Years. To. Come.”

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