Rod Fyffe’s Hair Revealed to be Made of Noodles

By on March 24, 2016
Mr.Fyffe and hair.

A month long investigation by the Bendigo Standard has uncovered the truth about Lord Mayor Rod Fyffe’s hair (pictured).

It is not made of brush wire, electric sparks, or zany ideas, as has often been expected.

The hair is in fact pre-recooked instant noodles, plugged into a skull cap much like a wig but with far less horse hair.

The revelation was made when packets upon packets of Instant Noodles were delivered to Lord Mayor Fyffe’s home address by accident, rather than the local Ashley and Martin where most wigs are bought these days.

Initial suspicion began when what was assumed to be dandruff scattering around the Lord Mayor’s robes was identified as noodle crumbs, and rather than being a sloppy cook it was suggested that the Lord Mayor’s hair is made of the stuff.

Sauces close to the hair (get it? sauces!) declined to confirm or deny the allegation, yet the Bendigo Standard has this assertion on reliable authority.

This discovery poses many questions, such as what happens when it rains and is he using locally made noodles or buy a cheap imported alternative?

The City of Greater Bendigo was not contacted for comment.

by Luke Morris.

All items on this website are fictitious. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental or is intended purely as a satire, parody or spoof.

About Luke Morris

After writing skits, columns and stories for a university magazine, Luke was a copywriter and web content manager in the wine industry. Since then he has written documentary and comedy treatments for television and cinema, as well as education, short story and humour blogs, short stage plays, humour articles, and novels. His work has been used by LeftLion, Fairfax, Play6, The Curio, Vinified, and various other blogs and businesses. He has appeared at stand-up shows in Australia, England and Iceland, and is active with Bendigo Comedy.

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