Teenager At Shamrock Hotel Talks About Elephant in Room

By on June 12, 2016
Coming soon to the Shamrock is famous dance artist Ellie Funk.

Garth Brooks, 18, from California Gully, was unaware of the faux pas he was making.

“There was a freaking elephant in the room!” he said with eyes wide.

Yes, a four metre tall, 6 tonne African elephant was in the basement bar of the Shamrock Hotel.

Most people knew to say nothing.

But Mr Brooks couldn’t help himself.

“How the hell did it get in there?” he asked.

“What? You think someone brought it in for show and tell?”

The understanding of not talking about an elephant in a room is as ancient as keeping someone’s mum hidden under floorboards when asked not to spread a secret, perhaps with a gag over her mouth and feed using a drip.

Yet on the elephant topic Brooks continued to yap.

“It couldn’t have fit in the elevator!” he said. “What? You think it walked down the stairs for a drink? Can an elephant even navigate stairs? Surely it would tumble forward and slam into a wall.”

Distinguishable from an Asian elephant by the language it speaks and lack of interest in curry, the male African elephant was seen leaving the bar around taxi time with a female giraffe.

“Sure,” said Brooks. “Why judge? I mean, we all scored that night. It was great.”

Apparently elephants bring good luck, especially if the trunk is up, and his trunk was up.

All items on this website are fictitious. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental or is intended purely as a satire, parody or spoof.

About Luke Morris

After writing skits, columns and stories for a university magazine, Luke was a copywriter and web content manager in the wine industry. Since then he has written documentary and comedy treatments for television and cinema, as well as education, short story and humour blogs, short stage plays, humour articles, and novels. His work has been used by LeftLion, Fairfax, Play6, The Curio, Vinified, and various other blogs and businesses. He has appeared at stand-up shows in Australia, England and Iceland, and is active with Bendigo Comedy.

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