Local Sign Misunderstands the Meaning of the Word Hour

By on November 2, 2018

Spotted in Bendigo North, outside of the Cambrian Hotel, a sign was seen proclaiming Happy Hour between 3 and 6pm.

“Time is not a constant,” said local barman James Barnicsh, “As Einstein’s Theory of Relativity explains, time is relative to space, so that the faster you move through space, time slows down, therefore because of the heightened Good-times Dynamics within the Hotel, nurtured by fine drinks and stimulating conversation, while it may feel like only one hour has passed, in fact it has travelled from 3pm through to 6pm in the regular world.”

This means that time flies outside of the Hotel while you’re having fun?

“Yes,” said Mr Batnicsh.

And the Hotel is therefore like some form of Tardis, fixed on the corner of Arnold and Bannister Street, just up from the Bendigo Base.

“Yes,” said Mr Baryicsh.

Which equally suggests that the secret to long life is to live within the Cambrian Hotel walls.

“it’s true,” said Mr Barntcsh.

So in that sense, the wording of the sign is accurate.

“Yes,” said Mr Barnicst.


About Luke Morris

After writing skits, columns and stories for a university magazine, Luke was a copywriter and web content manager in the wine industry. Since then he has written documentary and comedy treatments for television and cinema, as well as education, short story and humour blogs, short stage plays, humour articles, and novels. His work has been used by LeftLion, Fairfax, Play6, The Curio, Vinified, and various other blogs and businesses. He has appeared at stand-up shows in Australia, England and Iceland, and is active with Bendigo Comedy.

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