All posts tagged "Bendigo"

  • Hipster Crushed To Death By Own Man Bun

    BREAKING: Paramedics are preparing to transport a man to hospital after reportedly being crushed by his own Man Bun The incident occurred at a Butte St property in North Bendigo a short time after 9:45am. A Bendigo...

    • Posted November 17, 2017
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  • drink
    Eaglehawk Student Cures Hangovers Permanently

    Eaglehawk Student Greg Frankly has created the most successful hangover cure. The 16 year old accidentally discovered “Uncle Greg’s Wake-Up Juice” upon returning from the school dance after a big night out. The recipe includes mixing every...

    • Posted July 22, 2017
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  • Bendigo Standard Investigates the Eye Thingy Fake News Stuff

    “Nup. Not a clue who made it,” said Mike Elliott, Senior Editor of the Bendigo Standard. “I’ve not even seen the eye thingy story,” said Luke Morris, Junior Vice-Senior Editor of the Bendigo Standard. Apparently the media...

    • Posted July 19, 2017
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  • Storm Shakes Bendigo Man’s House and Makes Him Wish He Bought a More Expensive House

    Wind and rain lash Bendigo, causing Adam West to rue his decision to opt for the rustic look. “Okay, okay,” said Mr West, holding a shoe box over his head, “I could have gotten one of those...

    • Posted July 17, 2017
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  • Bendigo To Host John-Jacob Jingleheimer-Schmidt Convention

    Bendigo is set to host the first annual John-Jacob Jingleheimer-Schmidt Convention. The event will be hosted at the All Seasons Conference Centre next year. The convention, as announced by Mr Jingleheimer-Schmidt yesterday, is “invite only” for other...

    • Posted April 28, 2017
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  • Moron Gets Stuck In House Of Mirrors

    Huntly man Lance Richter, was trapped in the House of Mirrors in Rosalind Park for 5 hours yesterday. The 62-year-old father of 2 was with his children when he became disoriented and started freaking out. He sent...

    • Posted April 24, 2017
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  • Trump Email To Mexico Exposed

    Donald Trump, the top brass of America, has gone about revenue raising in the best way he knows how. “We asked Potus what he wanted to do about paying for the whole wall schmozzle,” said Junior Vice-President...

    • Posted January 28, 2017
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  • The Back Pain Cure Bendigo Doctors Hate For You To Know

    “Sure it works for back pain,” said Dr Julius M. Hibbert of a Kangaroo Flat medical practice. “It’s oxycodone. It’ll work on migraines, gun shots, and decapitation.” This wonder drug was identified when Doug Attick, not his...

    • Posted December 28, 2016
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  • World Safari 4 In Production

    “What with Bear Grylls, Turtle Man, and Donald Trump rocking it in the reality TV world, I thought it was time,” said Australian-freaking-icon Alby Mangles. With the choke hazard that was dusting off the VHS camera complete,...

    • Posted December 23, 2016
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  • Self-employed Woman Gets Herself In Her Office Secret Santa

    “What are the odds,” said Megan Washington rhetorically. Ms. Washington, 24, Long Gully, and a freelance bobcat operator, stood in her flat’s staff/lounge room and drew herself in her office Kris Kringle dip. “I pulled myself out...

    • Posted December 19, 2016
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