All posts tagged "Bendigo"

  • Less Spew Outside Elmore Memorial Hall Than Expected

    “I was expecting a lot more spew,” said a charmed tourist to Elmore. Last night Orchestra Victoria continued its tour of towns-never-really-heard-of, allowing people not from around here to come, sit, listen, and be enchanted by their...

    • Posted August 15, 2018
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  • Bendigo Comedy gigs in August

    Do you want to do stand-up comedy in Bendigo? Contact Friday 3 August – Shamrock Comedy –   September… Friday 7 September – Shamrock Comedy – Friday 21 September – Open Mic at the...

    • Posted August 14, 2018
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  • TV Reporter Visibly Sick at Having to Talk About Donald Trump

    TV Reporter Visibly Sick at Having to Talk About Donald Trump “Yeah it just hit me,” said Margot Robbie. “I’d been talking about Donald Trump for not even a few seconds, and just the thought of reporting...

    • Posted April 28, 2018
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  • Bendigo Man Eats Own Head

    “Tastes like chicken,” reported Megan Fox, translating for her husband Mark Fox, 24, from Strathfieldsaye. It started as a bet, as these things do, when on an end of season footy trip a teammate of Mark’s at...

    • Posted January 7, 2018
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  • Big Stories of 2017 in Bendigo: Marriage Rights

    Emotional scenes in Bendigo this year as a plate ran away with a spoon. “It’s simply ridiculous,” said Pasta Joylife, a Catholic spokesman (Yep it was a man. Definitely a man. We’re not being sexist but you...

    • Posted December 23, 2017
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  • Hipster Crushed To Death By Own Man Bun

    BREAKING: Paramedics are preparing to transport a man to hospital after reportedly being crushed by his own Man Bun The incident occurred at a Butte St property in North Bendigo a short time after 9:45am. A Bendigo...

    • Posted November 17, 2017
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  • drink
    Eaglehawk Student Cures Hangovers Permanently

    Eaglehawk Student Greg Frankly has created the most successful hangover cure. The 16 year old accidentally discovered “Uncle Greg’s Wake-Up Juice” upon returning from the school dance after a big night out. The recipe includes mixing every...

    • Posted July 22, 2017
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  • Bendigo Standard Investigates the Eye Thingy Fake News Stuff

    “Nup. Not a clue who made it,” said Mike Elliott, Senior Editor of the Bendigo Standard. “I’ve not even seen the eye thingy story,” said Luke Morris, Junior Vice-Senior Editor of the Bendigo Standard. Apparently the media...

    • Posted July 19, 2017
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  • Storm Shakes Bendigo Man’s House and Makes Him Wish He Bought a More Expensive House

    Wind and rain lash Bendigo, causing Adam West to rue his decision to opt for the rustic look. “Okay, okay,” said Mr West, holding a shoe box over his head, “I could have gotten one of those...

    • Posted July 17, 2017
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  • Bendigo To Host John-Jacob Jingleheimer-Schmidt Convention

    Bendigo is set to host the first annual John-Jacob Jingleheimer-Schmidt Convention. The event will be hosted at the All Seasons Conference Centre next year. The convention, as announced by Mr Jingleheimer-Schmidt yesterday, is “invite only” for other...

    • Posted April 28, 2017
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