All posts tagged "Featured"

  • Private School Removes ‘School’. Offers New Classes

    Parents are outraged this today after a unnamed private school principal from Bendigo banned the word “Schools” from schools, claiming he wanted to make schools “more acceptable to lower class families”. “It’s not a school. It’s a...

    • Posted January 30, 2018
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  • Man Finds Way To Eat Banana In A Non-Sexy Way

    Eaglehawk man Greg Dawson found a non-sexy way to eat a banana today. He was on his morning tea break and wore a Donald Trump mask he was given in last years Kris Kringle. Work colleagues discovered...

    • Posted January 29, 2018
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  • Big Stories of 2017 in Bendigo: Marriage Rights

    Emotional scenes in Bendigo this year as a plate ran away with a spoon. “It’s simply ridiculous,” said Pasta Joylife, a Catholic spokesman (Yep it was a man. Definitely a man. We’re not being sexist but you...

    • Posted December 23, 2017
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  • game of thrones
    Huntly Man Brags About Never Seeing Game Of Thrones

    HUNTLY MAN Guy Sunbury announced to his work colleague’s he has never seen an episode of Game Of Thrones. The conversation began around the water cooler during morning tea in June. He was asked if he was...

    • Posted November 20, 2017
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  • Hipster Crushed To Death By Own Man Bun

    BREAKING: Paramedics are preparing to transport a man to hospital after reportedly being crushed by his own Man Bun The incident occurred at a Butte St property in North Bendigo a short time after 9:45am. A Bendigo...

    • Posted November 17, 2017
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  • drink
    Eaglehawk Student Cures Hangovers Permanently

    Eaglehawk Student Greg Frankly has created the most successful hangover cure. The 16 year old accidentally discovered “Uncle Greg’s Wake-Up Juice” upon returning from the school dance after a big night out. The recipe includes mixing every...

    • Posted July 22, 2017
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  • Bendigo Standard Investigates the Eye Thingy Fake News Stuff

    “Nup. Not a clue who made it,” said Mike Elliott, Senior Editor of the Bendigo Standard. “I’ve not even seen the eye thingy story,” said Luke Morris, Junior Vice-Senior Editor of the Bendigo Standard. Apparently the media...

    • Posted July 19, 2017
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  • Storm Shakes Bendigo Man’s House and Makes Him Wish He Bought a More Expensive House

    Wind and rain lash Bendigo, causing Adam West to rue his decision to opt for the rustic look. “Okay, okay,” said Mr West, holding a shoe box over his head, “I could have gotten one of those...

    • Posted July 17, 2017
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  • Netflix Logo
    Bendigo Man Finishes Everything On Netflix

    EPSOM man Bruce Richards today announced on Social Media he had finished watching everything on Netflix. The 43 year old quit his position as a Barista 2 years ago to become a professional Netflix watcher. “I started...

    • Posted April 26, 2017
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  • Bendigo Medical Reminds Man Of Routine Pap Smear

    “Golly,” said Mr Luke Morris. “I didn’t know I needed to have a pap smear.” The email he received spoke of a routine procedure conducted on women. “The bit I found most surprising was not the lack...

    • Posted December 18, 2016
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