National News
Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum
"It's was a simple procedure," said Dr Chris from the hit BBC/ABC show Scottish Vets Down Under. "We mainly cut off the dangling bits."
Prime...
Dan Andrews Reveals Ring Of Steel Is Just A Giant Egg Ring
Victorian Premier Dan Andrews announced today that the ring of steel encasing Melbourne is actually a giant egg ring.
"Victorians love their eggs in the...
Moama Man Drives To Dubbo Dan Murphy’s After Being Denied Entry To Echuca
A Moama man has been denied entry into Victoria today under new border controls.
Desperate Moama man Callum McCallum was trying to get to...
Melbourne Braces For Another Round Of Zoom Meetings
"Oh yuck," said Derrick Mekong, 26, Melbourne.
It's pretty bloody crap for a lot of people right now.
"But back to Zoom. Man, that's like a...
Melbourne Replaces Ballarat As Victoria’s Least Liveable City
"Do you want Coronavirus or frost? It's a tough choice," said Lindy Swan, 29, of no fixed address.
The choice of where not to live...
Dome Sweet Dome. Elon Musk To Build Melbourne ‘Cyberdome’
BREAKING - Elon Musk has agreed to build a giant stainless steel 'Cyberdome' to enclose Melbourne for the next 2 years to help combat...
Father Of Three Asks, “Is It Wednesday?”
"I could have sworn it was no later than Thursday," said Guy Bush, 32, of Huntly.
In a scene familiar to households across the nation,...
Castlemaine Neither A Castle Nor A Maine
Boring word guy Will Neverme, 24, of Sailors Gully, said of Castlemaine, "Technically speaking a castle is any fortified structure, often with a moat...
COVIDsafe App Not As Fun or Security Flawed As FaceApp
Remember that "old face" making app?
The one that had the Jonas Brothers post that picture of themselves looking old, and everyone sort of thought,...