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Bendigo

Bendigo Coffee Shops Replace Flat White With ‘Flat Caucasian’—Extra Cream, Zero Sensitivity!

The humble Flat White has become the latest casualty in Bendigo’s troubling coffee culture war as local shops ditch the beloved Flat White in favour of a new ‘Flat Caucasian.’

“I came in for my usual morning Flat White, and the barista handed me a Flat Caucasian,” complained Eaglehawk resident Brett Hammersley. “I asked what the difference was, and they just winked and said, ‘It’s the same but with a little more entitlement.'”

The move has sparked heated debates on social media, with many questioning the necessity of the change. “Are we supposed to taste the gentrification in this?” tweeted one angry customer.

With Flat Whites becoming Flat Caucasians, one has to wonder – what’s next for the City of Greater Bendigo? The renaming of White Hills may be the start.

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