A Golden Square man has been taken into custody after luring a miner into his suspiciously unmarked van. The victim, 54-year-old Kev from Fosterville Gold Mine, was unharmed.
“He had a lot of strong opinions about American politics,” the victim told The Bendigo Standard, who described the encounter as “an unexpected 45-minute TED Talk on Trump and everything wrong with America.”
Police confirm the man faces charges of attempted abduction and emotional torture by extended political rant.
In response, local miners have reportedly doubled their escape drills, including rapid exits, evasive maneuvers, and a strict policy against van conversations.
