Your Horoscope – Week Of May 1, 2023

Here’s your horoscope for the week.

♉ Taurus | April 20 to May 20

This week, Taurus, you’ll find yourself channelling your stubborn inner mule. Embrace it! After all, who doesn’t love digging their heels in and refusing to budge, regardless of how sensible the alternative maybe?

Your lucky colour: Beige. Because who doesn’t love the colour plain and boring?

♊ Gemini | May 21 to June 20

Ah, Gemini, the twins. This week, you’ll make everyone’s life more exciting as you change your mind more often than a chameleon changes colours. Your friends and family will be dazzled by your indecisiveness.

Your lucky colour: Tan. Perfect for blending in with your surroundings and avoiding any attention.

♋ Cancer | June 21 to July 22

Oh, Cancer, your emotional rollercoaster will take an unexpected turn this week, but don’t worry; you’re used to it. You might find yourself crying over a sad commercial or laughing hysterically at a corny joke. Try to embrace the chaos – it’s what makes you so endearing. Lucky colour.

Your lucky colour: Olive. The colour of envy and jealousy is just what you need to feel better about yourself.

♌ Leo | July 23 to Aug. 22

Leo, your week will be filled with the limelight you crave, but be careful not to let your ego inflate like a hot air balloon. With great attention comes great responsibility – or something like that.

Your lucky colour: Maroon: The colour of dried blood, perfect for those who want to feel like a vampire.

Virgo | Aug. 23 to Sept. 22

Perfectionist Virgo, this week you’ll find yourself analyzing every tiny detail, even when no one asked for your opinion. But don’t worry; we all need a dose of unrequested advice from time to time.

Your lucky colour: Rust. The colour of decay is perfect for those who enjoy feeling old and worn out.

♎ Libra | Sept. 23 to Oct. 22

Libra, your indecisiveness will reach new heights this week as you struggle to decide whether you want a latte or a cappuccino. We know life is full of difficult choices.

Your lucky colour: Mustard Yellow. The colour of spoiled food is perfect for those who enjoy feeling nauseous.

Scorpio | Oct. 23 to Nov. 21

This week, Scorpio, your mysterious aura will continue to baffle those around you. Are you secretly an international spy, or is it just a matter of keeping your cards close to your chest? We may never know.

Your lucky colour: Pea Green. The colour of vomit is perfect for those who enjoy feeling sick.

♐ Sagittarius | Nov. 22 to Dec. 21

Sagittarius, your wanderlust will reach an all-time high this week, leading you to contemplate a life-changing decision, like ordering Chinese or Thai takeout. Adventure awaits!

Your lucky colour: Dusty Rose. The colour of an old lady’s lipstick is perfect for those who want to feel outdated.

♑ Capricorn | Dec. 22 to Jan. 19

Capricorn, your practicality will be your superpower this week as you effortlessly juggle your responsibilities and manage to avoid spontaneous combustion. Others may not appreciate your grounded nature, but someone has to be the adult in the room.

Your lucky colour: Lavender. The colour of Grandma’s bathroom is perfect for those who enjoy feeling like they’re in a nursing home.

♒ Aquarius | Jan. 20 to Feb. 18

Aquarius, your innovative ideas and creative thinking will lead you to invent something truly revolutionary this week, like socks with built-in sandals. Prepare to bask in the glory of your genius.

Your lucky colour: Coral. The colour of a sunburn, perfect for those who enjoy feeling like they just got back from a trip to the beach… in the 80s.

♓ Pisces | Feb. 19 to March 20

This week, Pisces, your empathetic nature will have you absorbing everyone’s emotions like a giant, cosmic sponge. It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it. Just remember to wring yourself out from time to time.

Your lucky colour: Brown. The colour of nature. Like dirt you’ll scrape off your shoes after a long hike.

♈ Aries | March 21 to April 19

Oh, Aries, your impulsiveness is only matched by your lack of patience. This week, your spontaneous energy will lead you to make a decision that only a seasoned magician could predict. Spoiler alert: it probably won’t be a wise one. But hey, who needs intelligent choices when you’ve got an adventurous spirit?

Your lucky colour: Baby Poop Brown. It’s a colour that’s both charming and delightful, like wearing a diaper filled with week-old baby poop.

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