• About
  • Contact
  • Support
Wednesday, June 25, 2025
The Bendigo Standard
  • News
  • Food & Drink
  • Life & Style
  • Politics
  • Law & Order
  • Opinion
  • Sport
No Result
View All Result
  • News
  • Food & Drink
  • Life & Style
  • Politics
  • Law & Order
  • Opinion
  • Sport
No Result
View All Result
The Bendigo Standard
No Result
View All Result
Home News

Coles Implements A Slow Checkout Lane for Those Who Enjoy a Good Chat

12 April 2023
in News

Felix Moose-knuckle (left) chats to Irma Gard (right) about his mother-in-law who plans on staying another two weeks to help with the kids. People behind him have been waiting more than 40 minutes.

In a groundbreaking move, Coles has introduced a new Slow Checkout lane for customers who love a good chat. This innovative lane caters to those who prefer to discuss the weather, politics, or their mother-in-law, rather than hurrying to bag groceries.

Coles spokesperson, Jenny Chatterbox, said, “We noticed a gap in the market. Some customers want a full conversation, while others want to grab their milk and leave.”

Customers are taking full advantage of the leisurely pace. One woman spent three hours discussing the pros and cons of reusable bags, causing the queue to stretch all the way to the frozen food aisle.

Coles aims to create a more relaxed shopping experience with the Slow Checkout lane. However, not everyone is thrilled. One disgruntled shopper remarked, “I accidentally joined the Slow Checkout lane and learned all about Tracy’s grandkids.”

Coles has employed checkout operators with a flair for gossip to make it even more appealing. Employees like Greta Gossipina are trained to discuss juicy topics and listen to customers’ thrilling tales.

Coles has plans to expand the service, including adding a dedicated “Pet Photo Sharing” checkout, where customers can swap pictures of their furry friends.

Next time you visit Coles, consider trying the Slow Checkout lane – just be prepared for a lengthy chat about grandma’s bunions.

ShareShareShareShareTweetSendSend
Previous Post

Local Dad Wears Socks With Sandals; Secretly Believes He’s A Fashion Icon

Next Post

Mum Swaps Son’s Room for Grandma; Kid’s World Crumbles

Related Articles

Local Teen Discovers Ancient Relic Known as ‘Roundabout Video Membership Card’
News

Local Teen Discovers Ancient Relic Known as ‘Roundabout Video Membership Card’

Sexyland Announces Grand Opening in Bendigo
News

Sexyland Announces Grand Opening in Bendigo

Bendigo Coles Replaces Groceries With 5000 Self-Serve Checkouts to Enhance Shopping Experience
News

Bendigo Coles Replaces Groceries With 5000 Self-Serve Checkouts to Enhance Shopping Experience

Taylor Swift Unveils Newest Persona: ‘Ted Swifton,’ Coles Busker
Music

Taylor Swift Unveils Newest Persona: ‘Ted Swifton,’ Coles Busker

Coles Busker Added To Groovin The Moo Line Up
Music

Coles Busker Wins Grammy

Bendigo Bank Christmas Party Runs Out of Mistletoe; Forced to Settle for Handshakes
News

Bendigo Bank Christmas Party Runs Out of Mistletoe; Forced to Settle for Handshakes

Please login to join discussion

GET OUR WEEKLY NEWSLETTER

This Just In

  • Echuca Bloke Thinks He Invented Camping After Buying $13 Kmart Tent
  • Your Horoscope With Mystic Shazza – Week Of June 23
  • Bloke Called Young Fella at RSL
  • Groovin the Moo Glitter Still Haunts Raver Like a Sparkly Horcrux
  • Eaglehawk Family Actually Live in California Gully
  • Man Pretty Sure Tenth Speeding Fine Will Finally Be the One That Makes Him Slow Down
  • Man Proudly Shows Off Southern Cross Station Tattoo
  • The Bendigo Standard Sits Down For An Interview With The Talking Tram
  • Emergency Services Called After Red Cordial Party Gets Out of Hand
  • Emergency Department Offers Express ‘Just Tell Me I’m Dying’ Lane for Hypocondriacs
The Bendigo Standard

The Bendigo Standard is a publication delivering news, commentary, and cultural insight from the heart of Central Victoria. We tell the stories that capture the spirit of the region.

SECTIONS

  • News
  • Food & Drink
  • Life & Style
  • Politics
  • Law & Order
  • Opinion
  • Sport

EXPLORE

  • About
  • Contact
  • Support

Recent Posts

  • Echuca Bloke Thinks He Invented Camping After Buying $13 Kmart Tent
  • Your Horoscope With Mystic Shazza – Week Of June 23
  • Bloke Called Young Fella at RSL
  • Groovin the Moo Glitter Still Haunts Raver Like a Sparkly Horcrux

© The Bendigo Standard

Welcome Back!

Login to your account below

Forgotten Password?

Retrieve your password

Please enter your username or email address to reset your password.

Log In
No Result
View All Result
  • Home
  • News
  • Food & Drink
  • Life & Style
  • Law & Order
  • Politics
  • Sport
  • About
  • Contact
  • Support

© The Bendigo Standard

Are you sure want to unlock this post?
Unlock left : 0
Are you sure want to cancel subscription?