Bendigo airport announced today plans to use Pall Mall as an emergency landing strip when Qantas flights take off in 2030.

“We need a wide, open, barren space, where there are never any pedestrians,” an airport spokesperson said. “We were hoping to use the new Napier street upgrade but people won’t appreciate closing a road they just reopened.”

The airport also looked at other options such as View Street, High Street in Eaglehawk or the Lansell Square car park, but changed their mind due to the ridiculous amount of pedestrian crossings disguised as speed humps.

The new Bendigo Airport will open at the end of March 2030, an estimated 6 months before the Napier Street upgrade is due completed