The City Of Greater Bendigo has told The Bendigo Standard that the Mall Rat problem in Hargreaves Mall isn’t that bad.
Bob Godfrey, a Councillor and amateur boxer from the Anthony Mundine Boxing Academy said “What problem? There’s no problem here. Mall is not a four-letter word… but often your reaction to it is.
“We’re seeing the future stars of UFC and boxing in the mall,” he said. “Did you see that fight on Saturday? It was pretty good, wasn’t it?”
“Some see the fights in the mall as a bad thing, I see it as character building. Besides, gyms are too expensive for kids,” Mr Godfrey said.
The council has tried a number of options to reduce mall violence and loitering including increasing parking meter fees but discovered that 13-year-olds can’t drive.
In a stunning backflip, the ring girls that were controversially dropped from Saturday nights match have been hired in future fights in Hargreaves Mall.
They were first featured at an illegal Santa Fight Club last Christmas when 22 Santas were arrested.
… that’s so lame.
How about female midget jelly wrestling.
That’s bound to really get the politically correct in a lather.