Kangaroo Flat man Trevor Sampson claims that he has seen a significant increase in his business since cuts to Medicare have increased the cost of going to the doctor.

Mr Sampson, a heroin dealer said “Now there are no bulk billing Doctors in the Flat it is easier for everyone to just get their pain relief needs from me, there has never been a more exciting time to be a heroin dealer”.

Local Doctor Ralf Bowie is furious.

“The illegal nature of Mr Sampson’s business means he can avoid pesky taxes and prescribing regulations, its bloody criminal” said Dr Bowie.