“We don’t know what happened,” said council worker and chief shovel leaner-oner Paul Ling, 24, of Maiden Gully.
Apparently it happened a few days ago.
“Just these norgs popped up out of the ground and the boss was all like ‘Strewth we better cover those up,’” said Mr Ling.
The decision was swiftly made to roll out artificial grass over all the mounds.
“There were big boobs and little boobs and long boobs that we just kinda had to work around with a Stanley knife and gaffer tape,” said Mr Ling.
Few suspect the intrigue happening below Hargreaves Mall.
“Narr we got kids on them, bouncing away, and with the umbrellas and stools it looks like some beer garden with a freaky sort of play area,” said Mr Ling.
Many suspect the creature living below the Mall is the reason so many shops there are vacant.
“It’s probably farting into the premises,” said Mr Ling.
What the long term plan for the boobs is, is unlcear.
“Maybe in winter we’ll make them look like mounds of snow,” said Mr Ling.
For now they will be made to look like something is alive in the centre of Bendigo.
