28-year-old Tim Spencer revealed that should he find himself with Spider-Man’s superpowers he would avenge his uncle’s death, but not creepy Uncle Jerry.
“I’ve always admired Peter Parker’s dedication to justice after losing Uncle Ben,” said Tim, a devoted fan of the iconic Marvel superhero. “If it were my Uncle Jerry, I’d have to reconsider.”
Although Spider-Man’s unwavering commitment to doing good and protecting the city is admirable, Tim acknowledges that not all family members share the same level of dedication.“With great power comes great responsibility, sure,” Tim explained. “But also, with great power comes great selectivity. You have to draw the line somewhere; for me, that line is Uncle Jerry.”
Mr Spencer’s detailed his uncle’s odd behaviours, including an unhealthy obsession with collecting Chucky Dolls, an inclination for licking stamps and conspiracy theories.
“If I found out Uncle Jerry was murdered, I’d still be like, ‘Maybe the police should handle this one,'” Tim told The Bendigo Standard. “I’m not saying I want anything to happen to him, but I can’t be everywhere at once, and I have to prioritise.”
When asked if he’d consider using his hypothetical powers to help his other uncles, Mr Spencer quickly clarified that he’d only avenge the deaths of uncles who fall within his acceptable range of creepiness.
“Uncle Mark with his taxidermy collection? Yeah, I could see myself avenging his death,” Mr Spencer mused. “But honestly, I think I’d draw the line at anyone weirder than that.”
At press time, Tim contemplated creating an Excel spreadsheet ranking his family members based on their worthiness of superhero vengeance.