“Where are all the DVDs, Dude?” asked Scott Day, 47, from Eaglehawk.
Mr Day took his family underground to avoid the distraction of the Y2K bug, and has poked his head above ground for the first time in 20 years.
“There’s barely any toilet paper. The pasta’s all gone. People are afraid to go outside. Dude? What up? Petrol prices are the same though,” said Mr Day.
Upon exiting his family’s bunker Mr Day investigated if it was safe to re-enter society.
“Mobile computers? Did you not learn? Look what happened, and you’re going heavier into computers? Seriously? Dude?” said Mr Day.
Concerned that the world will not learn from its mistakes, Mr Day has decided to bunker down for another 20 years.
“It’s as bad as I feared, Dude,” said Mr Day. “People are covered in tribal tattoos, shops are closed, and the Goo Goo Dolls haven’t released an album in years. It’s bleak times.”
With so much change, loss of resources, and increased reliance on technology, it’s no surprise that Mr Day is heading back underground as soon as he gets a few AA batteries for his walkman.
“I’ve got music, but dude, have you seen Pauly Shore lately? Without his new films this isn’t a world worth being in.”
End.