“It’s was a simple procedure,” said Dr Chris from the hit BBC/ABC show Scottish Vets Down Under. “We mainly cut off the dangling bits.”

Prime Possum, which is a man dressed as a possum costume character used by Channel Prime to tell kids when the really rude TV shows were about to start so the kids could watch them in bed, was brought to see the veterinarians by Mrs Possum.

“She’s a lovely lady, also dressed in a massive possum costume, who had been complaining about her husband sitting on the fence screaming at night and then rubbing his crotch on her leg,” said Dr Mike.

Evidence suggests Mr Possum was not aware that the bean bags for his old John Thomas were to be removed.

“He didn’t actually know why he was here,” said Dr Chris. “His wife kept saying it was for a hair cut. Which is half true.”

To their credit, the Scottish Vets did advise Mr Possum of the purpose of the procedure.

“We told him we were going to neuter him,” admitted Dr Mike, “But maybe it was our accent or the giant Possum helmet he wore, but he kept saying, ‘Youse are doing a great job, even if you’re new to this’.”

All ended well for Dr Chirs, Dr Mike, and Mrs Possum.

And if you have a randy man dressed in a giant animal costume suit who could use de-sexing, contact the Scottish Vets for their Neuter Television special deal, or watch them on the telly… but not on Prime.