In what can only be described as a calculated move, American Commander-in-chief Donald “Duck” Trump has slagged off Canada.
“No greater friends than the United States and Australia!” reads the media release by the Duck head of state.
It therefore is clear that Canada is not America’s No.1 friend.
Most likely not even number one on the speed dial.
The Duck’s phone probably reads AAAAustralia, and then AACanada, or maybe AAAPutin.
At the very least Australia is the United States greatest friend, in some ranking system probably like the WWC.
“For this very reason we as a nation need to console America about recent break-ups, missed job promotions, and how to get off that meth,” said a senior spokesperson from BestFriendAdvice.com
Because that’s what friends are for.
Canada was contacted for this article but they we’re too busy having a good time to care.