A fight has erupted in High Street Kangaroo Flat as smokers throw hands over butts outside the Windermere Hotel. Whilst there was a brawl, smokers were ultimately disappointed as...
♍ VIRGO
Your feelings today are like a squirrel trapped in a vending machine—confused, desperate, and weirdly snack-oriented. Avoid taking things personally, even if a stapler falls on your foot. It’s not the universe sending you a message; it’s just gravity being a jerk again... or something like that.
In a groundbreaking study that surprised no one, scientists have confirmed what we all suspected—the universe is a massive introvert.
The universe rapidly expands its...