In a surprising turn of events, the Bendigo Airport Bus has publicly declared that it is, in fact, not an airport. The statement, made during a press conference on the bus itself, has left many baffled and curious about the true nature of the transportation service.
In a recent survey, 98% of respondents admitted to being “hopelessly confused” about the bus’s function, with a further 2% still unsure if it was somehow a “really weird airport.”
“I want to make it absolutely clear,” said the bus in a statement delivered via a deeply confused city council spokesperson, “that I am not an airport. I do not have runways, air traffic control towers, or the capability to facilitate international travel. I’m just a bus. A bus that happens to be parked at the airport terminal and transports people to it. But definitely not an airport.”
City officials have weighed in, expressing mild bewilderment and a hint of irritation. “We’ve tried explaining this for years,” said Mayor Andrea Metcalf. “The Bendigo Airport Bus is not an airport. It’s a bus. We really thought this was common knowledge.”
“We’re just here to provide a reliable bus service and to remind everyone that if you’re looking for an airport, you might want to try somewhere else. Like, say, an actual airport.”
Passengers, meanwhile, have reacted with a combination of relief and dismay. “I’m just glad it finally cleared that up.”
