Marong Plans To Move Entire Town 2 Metres To The Left; Feng Shui Master Consulted

The City of Greater Marong has announced its audacious plan to shift the entire suburb 2 metres to the left. To improve its energy flow and overall harmony, town officials have enlisted the help of a renowned feng shui master.

Self-proclaimed mayor Gladys Stone explained the rationale behind this groundbreaking move. “We’ve noticed a slight misalignment in the town’s chi, and after extensive consultations with our feng shui guru, we concluded that a lateral shift is the solution.”

The logistics of moving an entire town may seem mind-boggling, but the Marongians are ready for the challenge. Streets will be realigned, buildings will be relocated, and even the town’s beloved swimming pool will be shifted 2 metres to the left.

Critics argue that such a move is unnecessary and bordering on the ridiculous. “Why don’t they focus on more pressing issues like fixing potholes or improving the school?” asked one resident.

Nevertheless, feng shui master Wendy assures everyone that this undertaking will revolutionize the town’s energy flow, leading to unimaginable prosperity and happiness. “By aligning Marong with the universe’s cosmic forces, we can expect an influx of positive vibes and good fortune”.

The Bendigo Standard
Are you sure want to unlock this post?
Unlock left : 0
Are you sure want to cancel subscription?