An office Christmas party planning committee proudly announced that they’ve successfully booked the least entertaining DJ in Bendigo. The selection process reportedly involved hours of careful consideration and meticulous research into local DJs renowned for their ability to drain all joy from a room.
“We wanted to set the bar low this year,” committee president Brenda Thompson said. “Why settle for a DJ who can keep people on the dance floor when you can have one who specialises in clearing it? It’s all about breaking the mould and embracing mediocrity.”
Famous for his uncanny ability to make elevator music sound like a rock concert, DJ Lullaby’s setlist will include classics like “The Sound of One Hand Clapping”, “80’s TV Jingles” and “White Noise.” Thompson said, “This party will be so uneventful that it’ll make watching paint dry feel like a rollercoaster ride.”
Attendees are already excited over the prospect of a night filled with awkward conversations, forced smiles, and the occasional cringe-worthy attempt at dancing. Thompson concluded, “This party will be so uneventful that it’ll go down in history as the benchmark for dullness. Move over, fun.”