Bendigo Man’s Self-Esteem Soars: Believes He’s a Bendigo 5 But A Long Gully 9

In a case of extreme delusions of grandeur, local Bendigo man, Trent Thompson, has reportedly convinced himself that he is a solid Bendigo 5 but an absolute Long Gully 9. Speaking with The Bendigo Standard, he acknowledged his “Long Gully looks” might be holding him back while his Bendigo charisma and charm were off the charts.

“I’m like a fine wine in the CBD, but when I step foot in Long Gully, I become more like a can of Red Bull left in the sun for a year,” Thompson quipped.

His friends were quick to admire his unique ability to grade himself like a budget wine in a fancy bottle. “His confidence is more like a Long Gully 4, at best.”

While experts speculate on the cause of Thompson’s newfound identity crisis, psychologists suggest he might have been exposed to an excessive dose of Bendigo pride.

Regardless, the man’s quirky belief has sparked a new trend among locals who are now busy rating themselves on the Bendigo scale. Meanwhile, Long Gully residents are just happy to be included in something unrelated to Highway Patrol for once.

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