Monday, March 25, 2019

Fashion

Mum Jeans Store Opens In Bendigo

A mum jeans shop will open its doors in Bendigo to a crowd of excited customers today in Bath Lane. Mum's Jeanery is the brainchild of Helen Matthews. A foster mum of six from Strath Heights. The boutique store specialises in mum jeans and jean jackets...

Read more
Marilyn Monroe Statue To Be Replaced With Rod Fyffe

Days after being re-elected as Mayor, Margaret O'Rourke has resigned. In a shocking twist, Rod Fyffe's Hair will serve as Mayor instead. Just like the man himself, Rod Fyffe's hair has a larger-than-life personality. "I've been watching Dad since I was just a follicle and...

Read more
Bendigo Man Eats Own Head

"Tastes like chicken," reported Megan Fox, translating for her husband Mark Fox, 24, from Strathfieldsaye. It started as a bet, as these things do, when on an end of season footy trip a teammate of Mark's at the Strathfieldsaye Jaguar Sharks challenged him to eat his...

Read more
Man Tries To Justify Looking At Dresses

The Maticevski exhibition in Bendigo stirred the interest of local David “Davo” Smith. “Bloody interesting, I mean, nothing weird about it, I mean, it's okay, strewth.” Davo, 24, of Cal. Gully, went to the fashion exhibition alone. “Mate, look, so, the lads didn't want a...

Read more
Queen Victoria to Come Out of the Shadows

A 113 year old statue of Queen Victoria is now Bendigo’s preeminent lady in a garden. But changes are afoot. “We’re looking to elevate her to icon status, as was befitting Marilyn,” says Bendigo Council marketing guru Helena Bonham Carter. Work on a facelift is...

Read more
Beards of Bendigo

World renowned rock band The Beards are playing Bendigo on their farewell tour. In recognition of this honour, and in honour of beards in general, the Bendigo Standard has complied this list of great beards in Bendigo. Some of them are better than others. The...

Read more
Mullets For Peace

The Australian Government has made a unified decision regarding hair and how hair should be cut for equality.... have made a law requiring that everyone should have a mullet haircut.  The Law is entitled 'The Mullet Act'. Starting from tomorrow, any person that is caught...

Read more