Porking Banned At Melville Caves

Porking has been banned at Melville Caves, citing concerns over public decency and wildlife disturbance. The decision has sparked outrage among residents who question expenditure of taxpayer funds on a giant sign reading “No Porking.”

Spokesperson Barry McGraw defended the decision, stating, “Melville Caves is a heritage site, not a honeymoon destination.”

Tourists visiting Melville Caves are also bemused by a sign advising against “inappropriate cave exploration.”

“I can’t believe they’re wasting money on signs for something that wasn’t even a problem,” fumed Eaglehawk resident Sheila Barnes, gesturing toward a freshly installed sign near the lookout. “I come here to hike and enjoy nature! Telling someone they can’t do something makes them want to do it more.”

Meanwhile, social media has erupted with memes and sarcastic comments, with one user quipping, “Guess it’s back to the backseat of a Holden for us, then!” As the controversy rages on, many wonder if this is the council’s weirdest decision yet—or just the tip of the iceberg.

The Bendigo Standard
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