In a shocking turn of events, parking underground at the Bendigo Marketplace has evolved from a mundane activity into a full-fledged blood sport, leaving shoppers questioning if their next trip to buy groceries might be their last.
Navigating the Marketplace’s underground parking has become a Darwinian struggle for survival as drivers battle for the coveted spots closest to the travelators. Witnesses report intense stare-downs, passive-aggressive honking, and the occasional duel over the last remaining space.
“I used to come here for stress-free shopping, but now it feels like I’m entering the Thunderdome from Mad Max,” said one shopper.
Marketplace officials have installed stadium-style seating for onlookers to enjoy the spectacle. Both lobbies now echo with spectators’ cheers and jeers as they witness the parking prowess—or lack thereof—on display.
“It’s a real adrenaline rush,” admitted one spectator, clutching a bag of popcorn and Wendy’s choc-mint ice cream as a yank tank and a Mazda3 engaged in a heated parallel parking showdown.
As shoppers contemplate whether the risk of vehicular combat is worth the convenience of underground parking, one thing is sure: Bendigo Marketplace has officially embraced the slogan, “Shop till you drop, or at least until you park.”
