Scientists Make Groundbreaking Discovery: Summer Is Hot

In a shocking turn of events, Bendigo’s top-notch scientists have declared a groundbreaking revelation: Summer is, in fact, hot. The Elf on the Shelf-like announcement shocked locals who have been inexplicably reaching for iced coffees and seeking refuge in air-conditioned spaces during what they previously believed to be the annual polar vortex.

“This is truly a game-changer for our community,” said one resident, wiping sweat from their forehead in what can only be described as genuine surprise. The research, funded by the Department of Obvious Observations, has left citizens pondering the true meaning of sunscreen and the mysterious purpose of swimwear.

In a related development, the Bendigo Fashion Police are reportedly investigating why most residents continue to wear winter coats in 30-degree weather as if auditioning for a role in a summer blockbuster set in the Arctic. Stay tuned for updates on whether the city will invest in an emergency shipment of Zooper Doopers to cope with this newfound scientific breakthrough.

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