A bustling workplace in Bendigo was thrown into disarray as their beloved DeLonghi coffee machine, affectionately known as “Beanzilla,” unexpectedly went on sick leave, leaving the entire office in a state of caffeinated chaos.
The incident occurred just as employees settled into their morning routines, eagerly anticipating their first cup of liquid productivity. However, instead of the machine, they were all met with a sign reading, “On sick leave. Be back tomorrow – Beanzilla”.
Tensions reached a boiling point, and a full-blown workplace riot broke out, with staplers being flung and keyboards used as makeshift weapons.
“It was like a scene from Mad Max, but with less leather,” remarked one witness, who wished to remain anonymous for fear of retribution from the coffee machine union. People were throwing staplers, flipping tables—anything to satisfy their caffeine cravings.”
One disgruntled employee attempted to brew their coffee using a sock and hot water from the office kettle.
“I never thought I’d see the day when a coffee machine held us all hostage,” said another angry employee.
Management issued a statement promising to resolve the crisis swiftly. “We are working tirelessly to bring the coffee machine back,” read the memo, hastily scribbled on a napkin. “In the meantime, please remain calm and refrain from cannibalism.”
