School Girl Wishes Magpies Would Swoop Teacher

“Bugger off ‘pies,” said Jessixa Hill, 7, Maiden Gully.

It’s magpie swooping season, and Jessixa Hill wishes they’d leave her alone.

“They bugger swoop me the buggers,” said Miss Hill.

Every day young Miss Hill has to walk to Maiden Gully Primary from across the street under that big tree with the magpies in it.

“They bugger at me and I wish they would stop,” said Miss Hill.

Aside from problems with a swooping magpie it seems Miss Hill hasn’t been taught what the word bugger means.

“I got Mrs Thompson and she’s a bugger, I wish the ‘pie would just bugger her,” said Miss Hill.

It seems Mrs Thompson doesn’t get along with little Jessixa.

“She gave me detention for bugger doing nothing,” said Miss Hill.

According to our sources it was because Jessixa kept saying bugger in class.

“It’s bugger stupid bugger shit,” said Jessixa, as she swung her school bag and ducked as a magpie swooshed passed her skull and pecked at the tiny kid in a pink parka.

“Bugger off stupid ‘pies! Go swoop a truck!” said Miss Hill.

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