Every article… ever!
- Bendigo’s Oldest Pothole Nominated for State Heritage Listing
- Locals Resort to Selling Organs As Fuel Prices Soar
- AFL Suggests Putting Zip Ties On Your Helmet To Prevent Magpie Attacks During Finals
- Bendi-Con Cosplayer Dressed As Doctor Manhattan Told To Chuck Pants On
- Bendigo Community Health Service Provides Free Condoms for Aged Care Homes
- Bendigo Breaks Silence on Alien Abduction Phenomenon – Turns Out They Just Want Good Coffee
- Local Conspiracy Theorist Discovers Council’s Sinister Plot: They’re Planting Trees
- Study Shows 99% of People Unaware They’re Background Characters in Someone Else’s Life
- Local Man Plans To Contract COVID-19 To Avoid His Own Wedding
- Primary School Wink Murder Game Turns Deadly. Parents Push for “Rock, Paper, Scissors”
- Marong Plans To Move Entire Town 2 Metres To The Left; Feng Shui Master Consulted
- Breaking News: Water Discovered to Be the Leading Cause of Drowning
- Victoria Bans Gas Connections, Opting for Power from Politicians’ Hot Air Instead
- Local Invents Time Machine, Travels to Future. Discovers He Still Has HECS Debt
- Listing Of The Week! The Ultimate Indoor Retreat!
- Bendigo Man’s Self-Esteem Soars: Believes He’s a Bendigo 5 But A Long Gully 9
- Bendigo Brewery Develops Beer That Doubles as Beard Oil
- Local Man Claims Yowie Sighting, Turns Out to Be Hairy Neighbour Taking Out the Trash
- Your Horoscope – Week Of July 3, 2023
- AI Chatbot Reviews Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny
- Jumper Cables Missing, Police Have No Leads
- Dad Achieves Legendary Status with Classic “Hi Bored, I’m Dad” Joke
- Castlemaine to Host World’s Most Boring Film Festival
- Nation in Crisis as Taylor Swift Tickets Prove Scarcer Than Unicorn Tears
- Kids Already Bored on First Day of School Holidays: Declare “Nothing to Do, Ever”
- Your Horoscope – Week Of June 26, 2023
- Spider-Man Fan Says He Would Avenge His Uncle’s Death, But Not That Creepy One
- Woman Marries Smartphone, Claims It’s the Only One Who Truly Understands Her
- Jenny’s ELC Introduces New Cage Fighting Curriculum
- Local Hipster Claims His Moustache Is a Registered Therapy Animal
- Flying Foxes Turns Rosalind Park into Unexpected Thrill-Seekers’ Playground
- Bendigo Churches Insist They Are Nothing Like Hillsong
- Man Discovers New Cat Species in Rosalind Park, Turns Out to Be Just a Possum
- Bendigo Bank Rolls Out Man Flu Leave
- New Study Shows 50% of People Can’t Spill
- ChatGPT Reviews The Little Mermaid
- Council Turns Potholes Into 5000 New Swimming Pools
- Bendigo Residents To Vote On Correct Pronunciation Of ‘Mall’
- Your Horoscope – Week Of May 22, 2023
- Castlemaine Plans Monumental Hipster Statue
- ChatGPT to Replace Bendigo Councillors, Promises to Be More Human than Actual Humans
- Sovereign Hill Historical Reenactor Devastated to Learn That World Has Moved on From Bowler Hats
- Local Woman Drops Phone In Lake Weeroona. Turtles Unimpressed by iPhone 14
- Your Horoscope – Week Of May 8, 2023
- ChatGPT Reviews Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3
- Galactic Empire Celebrates Star Wars Day by Blowing Up Bendigo
- Centrelink Hold Music Crushes Caller’s Spirit
- Local Woman Is 100% Sure The Discman In Cashies Is Hers
- Local Family Attempts Unprecedented 253rd Consecutive Taco Tuesday, Daring to Keep Tradition Alive
- Groovin The Moo Unleashes Brown Note, Neighbours Devastated by Uncontrollable Bowel Movements
- Unidentified Substance Found in Groovin The Moo’s Water Supply, Turns Out to Be Glitter
- Festivalgoers Swear They Can’t Feel Bass Even Though Stage Is 2 Metres Away
- Groovin The Moo Festivalgoer Overdoses on Good Vibes, Taken to Hospital
- Groovin The Moo’s Porta-Loos Named Bendigo’s Cleanest Toilets
- Groovin The Moo’s “Leave No Trace” Policy Now Includes Emotional Baggage
- Man Who Married Horse Saddles Up As Jerry Springer’s Pallbearer
- “Can Anyone Smell Weed Around Pall Mall?” Locals Demand Answers
- Amazon Echo Said It Heard Everything, And It’s Telling Mum
- Bendigo Pottery Unveils Chic Chamber Pots; Trendsetters Rush to Replace Their Toilets
- Study Finds People Who Ride Mobility Scooters Don’t Know Footpaths Actually Exist
- Letters To The Editor: Bendigo Creek Stink and The Talking Tram’s Midlife Crisis
- Hey Kids! Here’s Some Fun Activities For You
- “Groovin the Pew”: Holy Spirits Ignite Christian Music Festival
- Your Horoscope – Week Of May 1, 2023
- Grandparents Continue The Tradition Of Making Their House Smell Weird
- Man Found Living In The Rosalind Park Kaleidoscope, Claims He’s Just Another Reflection
- Blissfully Ignorant Parents-to-Be Fantasize About The Magical World of Parenthood
- La Trobe’s Bruce Week Rises from the Ashes, Now Named After WIN News Presenter
- Tourist Accidentally Books Tickets For Oprah, Not Opera
- Your Horoscope – Week Of April 17, 2023
- ChatGPT Reviews ‘Air’: When Michael’s Jordan’s Saved Our Soles
- Man Discovers Lost Treasure in Bendigo Creek, Turns Out to Be Shopping Trolley
- V/Line Unveils “Awkward Silence” Carriage for Dad Joke Aficionados
- Mum Swaps Son’s Room for Grandma; Kid’s World Crumbles
- Coles Implements A Slow Checkout Lane for Those Who Enjoy a Good Chat
- Local Dad Wears Socks With Sandals; Secretly Believes He’s A Fashion Icon
- Your Horoscope – Week Of April 10, 2023
- Local Man Entombed In Fridge On Friday Escapes On Sunday, Surprising Loved Ones
- Dog Furious It Can’t Eat Chocolate at Easter, Demands Scientific Proof
- Easter Bunny Flees Egg Hunt After Big Poo Is Mistaken for Chocolate Treat!
- E-Scooters Given the Go-Ahead; “Oh Shit! We’re All Gonna Die” Says Pedestrian
- Dad & Son Dodgem Duo Ready to Chuck Some Doughies at The Easter Festival
- Huntly Train Station: Officially the Least Visited Place on Earth
- Study Finds 7 Out of 10 Bendigo Dogs Prefer Craft Beer to Tap Water
- ChatGPT Reviews Mario Bros Movie
- Sacred Heart Cathedral’s New Stained Glass Window: Jesus Wearing Ugg Boots
- Bendigo’s Gold Mines Contain Chocolate Coins, Claims Local Conspiracy Theorist
- Your Horoscope – Week Of April 3, 2023
- Bendigo Standard Runs Out of News, Publishes Satirical News Article Instead
- Bendigo Man Refuses to Drink Coffee. Townsfolk Declare Him a Witch
- Bible Story Hour Debuts at Bendigo Library With Godly Flair
- Smart Fridge Locks Out Owner after 3 am Snack Binge
- Huntly Resident Patiently Awaits Vengabus for a Quarter Century
- Myer Bendigo Unveils Lisa Chesters’ Red Jacket Line
- Eaglehawk Reebok’s Crowned Official Footwear Of The 2026 Commonwealth Games
- New Study Shows That 100% of People Who Exercise Regularly Will Eventually Die
- Local Man’s Inability to Parallel Park Now Considered a Tourist Attraction
- 5-Year-Old Goes To The Hostabul To Get Tonsils Wemoved
- Your Horoscope – Week Of March 27, 2023
- Bendigo Fun Runners Finish Three Weeks Later Due to Excessive Sightseeing
- Local Man Excited to Spend Life Savings For Priceless Easter Fair Experience
- Shopper Clears 8000th Theft Suspicion By Big W Door Greeter
- Bendigo Celebrates Annual “Not Ballarat” Festival
- Bendigo’s Potholes Now Officially Classified as Tourist Attractions
- Bendigonians Successfully Steal Sydney Opera House, Claim “Finders Keepers”
- New Law Court’s Mime Courtroom Handles Cases in Complete Silence
- Study Reveals Bendigo Has More Cafés Than People
- Your Horoscope – Week Of March 20, 2023
- ChatGPT Reviews John Wick 4
- Qantas’ Bendigo To Sydney Mile High Club Attracts Lovers
- Cocaine Drop Bear Spotted On The O’Keefe Rail Trail
- BREAKING! King Bowser Does Not Work At Bowser Bean
- Holy Shit! Macca’s Frozen Coke Machine Actually Works
- I’m The Eaglehawk Cannon And I Want My Balls Back
- Your Horoscope – Week Of March 13, 2023
- Local Woman Convinced Fitted Sheets Don’t Want Folding
- ChatGPT Reviews Avatar: The Way of Water
- Jackass Flat Residents Latest Push for Name Change
- Your Horoscope – Week Of March 6, 2023
- Ratepayers Can’t Wait To See How The Council Spends Their Hard Earned Money
- Locals Disappointed There’s No Hoverboards In The Garden Of The Future
- Your Horoscope – Week Of February 27, 2023
- Bendigo Council Votes To Rename Huntly to Moist
- ChatGPT Reviews Cocaine Bear
- Building Evacuated After Work Colleague Sprays Lynx Africa
- Uber Eats Driver Eats Customer’s Order To Prove Point on Unsanitary Working Conditions
- Mario Wonders How Luigi Can Afford A Haunted Mansion In Bendigo On A Plumbers Salary
- Your Horoscope – Week Of February 20, 2023
- Wacky Waving Inflatable Tube Guy Sits In Bendigo Council Meeting
- ChatGPT Reviews Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania
- Wife Reminds Husband It’s Hot For The 50 Millionth Time
- “Toddler Buying Beach Shovel And Bucket Is A Hitman” Says Toyworld Employee
- Entire Family Admits They Hate Newborn’s Stupid Name
- Local Mum Serves Up A Delicious Serving Of Air From The Air Fryer
- Man Announces To The Missus The Pan Is Still Soaking
- Local Pays For Tattoo With A Cash Converters Loan
- 10 More Doughnut Shops Planned For Bendigo Marketplace
- Man Drives Like A Moron Hoping He Ends Up On Highway Patrol
- Man Celebrates 40th Birthday At Strath Village Maccas
- Dragon Museum Launches Mother-In-Law Expo
- Teenager Vapes In Hargreaves Mall To Prove He’s Cool
- Lansell Square Replaces Chadstone As The Fashion Capital
- Man Trying To Get A 42″ TV Into His Toyota Yaris Should Have Bought A Bigger Car
- Year 12 Student’s Daughter Starts Year 7
- Food Left In School Bag Over The Christmas Holidays Creates New Colony
- City Of Greater Bendigo To Introduce 7 New Wheelie Bins
- Read An Excerpt From Prince Harry’s Memoir About His Visit To Bendigo
- Long Gully Splash Park To Sell ‘Lemonade’
- Driver Films OnlyFans on Talking Tram Tour
- Council Requires Every Driver To Flip The Bird At Intersections
- Cambrian Patron Is Actually 3 Kids In A Trench Coat Pretending To Be An Adult
- Coles Busker Added To Groovin The Moo Line Up
- Explosive Prince Harry Memoir Reveals He Was Conceived On One Tree Hill Lookout
- Long Gully Splash Park Doubles As A Urine Recycling Centre
- New Pothole Memorial Walk Unveiled
- Local Soccer Player “Injured” After Partner Suggests Visiting The In-Laws
- Toilet Discovered On Mickey Mouse Hill
- Local Legend At Aquatic Centre Performs Belly Flop
- Student Secretly Believes Chemistry Teacher Is A Drug Kingpin
- Bendigo Train Station Selected As The Official Karate Venue For 2026 Commonwealth Games
- Bendigo Coles Only Playing ‘All I Want For Christmas’ For The Next 8 Weeks
- Dad’s Sneeze Sounds Like The Hulk Escaping A Vacuum Cleaner
- Nauseatingly Insufferable Couple Pose In Front Of The Bendigo Sign
- Cooinda Park Playspace Officially Renamed “The Park With The Big Slide”
- BREAKING! Croc Spotted In Bendigo Creek
- Reality Of Fatherhood Really Never Hit Home On Man Until He Changed Newborn Son’s First Nappy
- Nosey Nelly’s Take A Stickybeak at Lake Eppalock Spillway
- Locals Believe Building In The Upside Down Could Help Aleviate Housing Crisis
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of October 17, 2022
- Bendigo Art Gallery To Host Dewey Cox Exhibition
- ‘S’ Plates Introduced To Identify Shit Drivers
- Jane Bunn Predicts Bendigo Weather Using The ‘Duvet On, Duvet Off’ System
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of October 3, 2022
- Stray Birthday Balloons Causes Airport Kaos
- Bendigo To Host Scooter Stealing In 2026 Commonwealth Games
- Scientists Successfully Capture the Sound Of An Ant Farting
- Queen Elizabeth Oval Renamed “King Elizabeth Oval”
- Epsom Finally Gets a KFC
- Local Vegan Cafe Sells Grass Clippings As Lemongrass
- Dog Drives Owner Home From Pub After Grand Final Win
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of September 26, 2022
- Shazza Falls In Love With Braxton Doing A Fully Sick Burnout In The Long Gully IGA Car Park
- Long Gully Man Has Hard Time Convincing Friends He Doesn’t Carry Weed
- Vaping Now An Epidemic Among Kindergarteners
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of September 12, 2022
- Local 5-Year-Old’s Drawing Of Mummy Farting Misses Out On Archibald Prize
- Talking Tram Takes A Vow Of Silence
- Cat Sells Dog On Bendigo Buy Swap & Sell
- BREAKING! Keys Missing 3 Days Ago Found On Kitchen Bench
- Bendigo Resident Mildred Hussy Turns 200
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of May 2, 2022
- Rosalind Park Bats Chuffed For The New Batman Movie
- Local Man Believes Everyone Else In Bendigo Drives Like An Idiot
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of February 28, 2022
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of February 21, 2022
- Are You Investing In Crypto?
- ‘Heroes Are NOT Made At Bendigo TAFE’ Says Average Human
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of February 14, 2022
- Locals With ‘The Rona’ To Isolate On Lake Tom Thumb Island
- Local Man Hospitalised After Getting RAT Test Stuck Up His Bum
- Ikea Shopper Would Never Have Bought That Borgeby If She Knew She Had To Assemble It Herself
- Would You Ever Get A Tattoo Using Afterpay?
- Local Hero Finishes The Rifle’s 100 Pint Club. “He’s Only 1 Man” Says Patron
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of February 7, 2022
- Bikes On Buses
- Schools Back! ‘Parenties’ Set To Descend On Bendigo
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of January 31, 2022
- 22 Santas Arrested In Santa Fight Club
- 60 Christmas Conversation Starters
- Rod Fyffe’s Hair Receives Heritage Listing
- Woman Suspects The Neighbour Who Bought A Tesla Is The Mystery OzLotto Winner
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of August 9, 2021
- Bendigo Buses Replace hit91.9 with ABC Classic FM
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of July 26, 2021
- Long Gully Man Completes Flight To Space In A Rocket Bong
- Kid Declares There’s Nothing To Eat While Staring At A Full Fridge
- Bluey Unveiled As Brisbane 2032 Olympics Mascots
- City To Install Musical Toilets In CBD
- Local Mum Who Trained In Daughters Kiddie Pool Is Off To The Olympics
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of July 19, 2021
- Tokyo Olympics’ Outdoor Swimming Venue Smells Like Bendigo Creek
- Kangaroo Flat Residents Demand More Pedestrian Lights Across High Street
- Local Wonders How Many $%&#ing Servos White Hills Needs
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of July 12, 2021
- Eaglehawk Bin Captain Pranks Street By Putting Out Wrong Bins
- Funko Immortalize Cogho In Pop! Vinyl Form
- Local Office Worker Who Doesn’t Carry Cash Told He’s A Year Behind In Casual Dress Donations
- Bendigo TattsLotto Winner Decides To Fix Hargreaves Mall Himself
- Busker Ready To Revive Coles Busking Scene For The Third Time
- Trump Hires Sweaty Law Expert Dennis Denuto
- Bendigo Council Elections A Shambles. America: “Hold My Beer”
- Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum
- Church Of Scientology Brings Love To Universal Nightclub
- Mask Horror! Eaglehawk Woman Sets Own Face On Fire Lighting A Durry
- Council Shuts Down 6 Year Old’s Marijuana Stand For Not Having A Permit
- Grown Adult Still Traumatised By Faceless Doll In 90’s Kids Show
- Dan Andrews Reveals Ring Of Steel Is Just A Giant Egg Ring
- No Free Parking? Bendigo Councillors Added To Santa’s Naughty List
- Bendigo Council Elections: Recommended Eppalock Ward Candidates
- Bendigo Council Elections: Recommended Whipstick Ward Candidates
- Bendigo Council Elections: Recommended Lockwood Ward Candidates
- Facemasks Now Mandatory For Statues
- Melbournians Urged to Stay The Fork Away From Bendigo
- Moama Man Drives To Dubbo Dan Murphy’s After Being Denied Entry To Echuca
- Where Do We Wash Now? Ask Kangaroo Flat Residents
- Melbourne Braces For Another Round Of Zoom Meetings
- Fyre Fest Producers To Run For US Presidency
- Bendigo Airport Offers Fake Flights For Sydney-Starved Tourists
- Melbourne Replaces Ballarat As Victoria’s Least Liveable City
- Dome Sweet Dome. Elon Musk To Build Melbourne ‘Cyberdome’
- Dan Andrews Announces Single Loser Friend Can Visit Too
- Most Complicated Hopscotch Ever Produced
- Person Goes To Mickey Mouse Hill For The View
- Anakin Skywalker Declares Coronavirus Is “Not Podracing”
- Father Of Three Asks, “Is It Wednesday?”
- Castlemaine Neither A Castle Nor A Maine
- Despite Lockdown Castlemaine Is As Vibrant As Ever
- COVIDsafe App Not As Fun or Security Flawed As FaceApp
- Cat Fails To Search For Coronavirus Cure
- Man Puts All Bins Out in Hope One of Them is Right
- Y2K Doomsdayer Emerges To Find World Rebuilding
- Close Talker Struggles With 1.5m Rule
- Fashions On The Flu: Are You A The Kelly Gang Member or A Member of The Mouth Mask Mob? Take Our Quiz To Find Out!!
- Australians To Start Taking More Shits At Work
- 5 Toilet Paper Replacements That Work And 5 That Don’t
- Local Man Celebrates Valentines Day By Getting The Bathroom To Himself
- Council To Provide Parking Bays For Dickhead Drivers
- Bendigo TAFE Offers ‘Adulting’ Course
- Dad Refers To Groovin The Moo As ‘Groovin To The Moo’
- Vengabus Added To Bendigo Bus Network
- Marketplace Offers ‘Insensitive’ Santa For Kids On His Naughty List
- Humans of Bendigo #1 – Eleanor McLeod
- Study Finds 100% of Kids Singing Daddy Finger or Baby Shark Song Will Miss Christmas
- Local Man Drowns In His Sleep From His Wife’s Throw Pillows
- Darrell Lea To Release The Taste Of Bendigo
- No Food. Bendigo Cinemas Install Body Scanners
- What Hills? White Hills renamed ‘Flat White’
- Man Wonders If It’s Dad Shorts Weather Yet
- A New Era! The Standy To Be Distributed In Paper Form
- Teen Receives Glass Pipes from Wish.com. Parents Furious
- Couple Named Jett and Bec Reckons They Could Do Home Reno’s After Watching The Block
- Victorian Schools To Trial Zombie Apocalypse Survival Drill
- City Of Greater Bendigo Hires Kenny To Clean Public Toilets
- Kangaroo Flat Man Finally Takes Down Christmas Decorations
- Kennington Reservoir Parkrunner Names Newborn ‘Kenny Res’
- The Muppets live action movie have casted Statler and Waldorf
- Woman Burns Downs House After Spotting Spider
- Local Man Gives Three Thumbs Up To Bendigo’s Smallest Parma
- Bendigo Standard to merge with Bendigo Have Your Say
- Local Man Fired For Putting Communal Sauce In The Fridge
- Napier Street Mineshaft Triggers Fear Of Holes
- Construction Begins On Napier St Mosque
- Maiden Gully Family Books Accommodation For 2020 Easter Festival
- City With Violence Problem Cool With Boxing Match
- NASA to Investigate Stickiness of Tap House Carpet
- Dr Google Joins Bendigo Health
- Bendigo Council Welcomes New Robot Mower Overlords
- Leia Organa Steals Plans To Mosque
- Local Man Discovers You Can’t Get Naked At Get Naked Espresso Bar
- Festival Planned To Celebrate Napier St Upgrade
- Traders Hope ‘Baby Shark’ Song Will Drive The Rest Of Bendigo Away From Mall
- Lamb At Australian Sheep and Wool Show Under Investigation For PEDs
- “Holy Crap The Road’s Finished!” Locals Call For Public Holiday
- Donald Trump Meets Macho Man Randy Savage
- Megan Claims Religious Freedom For Not Cleaning Staffroom Dishes On Her Rostered Day
- “Babyccino’s Are Gateway to Caffeine Addiction” Says Local Mum
- News Flash: Clogs Doesn’t Sell Wooden Shoes
- Channel 10 Begins Filming I’m From Bong Gully… Get Me Out Of Here ya ****!
- Is Buddy Giving Two Up Yours or Two Thumbs Up? You Be The Judge
- Bendigo To Host Australia’s First Frozen Meal Expo
- Remains Of George Lansell Discovered On Napier Street Upgrade
- Tramspotting Screening at the Star Cinema
- 5 Places In Bendigo To Fart Without People Knowing It Was You
- Great Scott! Rod Fyffe Cast As Doc Brown In Upcoming Back To The Future Remake
- Council Commits $50m for ‘Rough Surface – Slow Down’ Signs
- Active Living Census Makes Everyone Feel Fat
- Viewpoint Residents Wonder Why Their Central Park Looks Nothing Like New York’s
- Helicopter Flying Over Bendigo Identified As The Bendigo Have Your Say Flying F***
- Local Man Records Sound Of Fart
- Trolley Bay Ruins Man’s Day
- Kangaroo Flat Man Has Zero Idea About Napier St Roadworks
- Divine Intervention Sought For Napier St Roadworks
- BREAKING: Council To Repair Roads That Actually Don’t Needed Fixing
- Napier St Upgrade Documentary “What The F**k Is Taking So Long?” Coming To Netflix
- 10 Bendigo Public Toilets Reviewed. Number 2 Will Surprise You
- Notre Dame To Be Completed Before Napier St Upgrade
- WA expat discovers Emu Export at Dan Murphy’s
- Liberal Party’s Sam Gayed to play the Invisible Man in movie reboot
- Pizza Shop Refuses To Deliver To House On Napier St Upgrade
- Healthy Harold To Run In Bendigo Federal Election
- Feuding bell-ringers decide to pull together
- Bendigo Have Your Say Wins Nobel Peace Prize
- Bendigo Powerball Winner Buys Long Gully
- Local Man Sues Hundreds-and-Thousands Believing Only 274 Exist
- Groovin the Moo: Pill Tester Has Big Day On The Job
- Unvaccinated Banned From Groovin The Moo
- Groovin The Moo: Old Man Tries to Look Cool Wearing Stupid Red Hat
- Hawthorn Announces New Mascots
- Local Who Couldn’t Get Tickets To Groovin The Moo Not Impressed With Line Up
- 20 Things To Do After Groovin The Moo
- ‘Long live the King’. Local woman can’t wait to see Mufasa die in live Lion King remake
- EPA Issues Warning On Using Public Toilets In The CBD
- Groundbreaking Surgery Removes Clingy Girlfriend From Boyfriend
- Bendigo Toe Tickler released on parole
- Parking Cost Increase. New Parking Meters To Accept Internal Organs
- Avid Parade Watchers Use Giant Tent As A Parade Save Spot
- Bendigo Easter Dragons “Unrealistic” Claims Local Game Of Thrones Expert
- Black Hole To Become Bendigo’s Newest Landfill
- The Real Housewives Of Strathfieldsaye Begins Filming
- Organisation accused of sexism, corruption, malpractice and theft distances itself from Israel Folau
- Local man gives up being ‘That Guy’ on Bendigo Have Your Say for Lent
- Couple Names First Child Bong Gully
- Bendigo Mother Asks Son To Netflix And Chill
- Huntly Man Brags About Never Seeing Game Of Thrones
- Bendigo Reminded To Wind Clocks Forward As Daylight Savings Ends
- “Long Gully’s Not That Bad” says person who lives there
- Kid in the mall says he got 6th degree black belt from watching John Wick 3 trailer
- First passenger on Qantas flight to Sydney didn’t actually need to go anywhere
- Local man surprises workmates with his incredible weather predicting skills
- Cat Awakens From 2004 Christmas Food Coma
- Local Man creates Bendigo Have Your Say app
- Council sells Bendigo creek bluestones to build Trump’s border wall
- Local unsure if ‘Bendigo Lifts 4 Cash’ is for drug deals or booty calls
- Locals call for larger portions at Lazy Moe’s
- Bendigo Tourism Sells Out Of Genuine Bendigo Creek Scented Candles In 30 Minutes
- Local Man Stuck On Napier St Upgrade For 3 Weeks Survives On Macca’s Sauce Packets
- Scott Cam Offers To Complete Napier Street Upgrade Pro Bono
- Local Clown Cheers Sick Children By Not Visiting Hospital
- Magic: The Gathering Player Suspended After Failing Drugs Test
- Elderly Local Man Saves $1 On Fuel A Year By Rounding Down
- Local Influencers Apply For Centrelink After Instagram Goes Down
- Bendigo Airport To Utilise Pall Mall As Emergency Landing Strip
- Married At First Sight Fans Ineligible To Vote In Next Council Election
- Teachers Reveal: Burst Pipe On Napier St Upgrade Was Just An Excuse To Get A 4 Day Weekend
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of March 11, 2019
- Bendigo Council Unveils New Napier St Fountain After Pipe Bursts
- Marie Kondo Brings ‘Spark Joy’ To Napier Street Upgrade
- Survey Results: 1 in 500 Don’t Believe Ironbark Exists
- Rental Crisis: Bendigo Council Puts Lake Weeroona Playground On Airbnb
- Your Horoscopes – Week Of March 4, 2019
- Runaway Bull Mauls 60 During Night On The Town
- Local Woman Discovers She Can Leave Bendigo Have Your Say Anytime She Wants
- Right Up Your Alley: S#!*ty Bowling Launches In Bendigo
- BSSC Student Wins Top Prize For Hangover Cure
- Eaglehawk Scooter Rider Refuses To Acknowledge ‘Cool’ Skateboard Dad
- Roast Chicken Too Big To Fit In Organics Bin
- “I’m Cool With The Napier Street Road Works” Says The Only Person In Bendigo
- Your Horoscope – Week Of February 18, 2019
- Local Man Gets Life Advice From A Maccas French Fry Giving A Thumbs Up
- Record January Temperatures Cause Sharp Spike in Bad Valentines Cards
- Lamington Drive To Fund The Completion Of The Murphy Street Roundabout
- Chinese Dragons To Be Sewn Together Into A ‘Dragon Centipede’ For Easter Festival
- 82-Year-Old Lost On School Excursion Emerges From Mine After 67 Years
- Australia Has Decided! Fat Cat And Patsy Biscoe To Represent Australia In Eurovision
- Studies Show First-Born’s Are Better Drivers Than Their Younger Siblings
- Kangaroo Sets Sights On Anthony Mundine After Enrolling In Boxing Class
- Overly Excited Local Man Won’t Shut Up About His Weber
- Chicken Salt Dealers Arrested in Strathdale
- Local Loses 85 kgs On A Bendigo Original Pie Shop Diet
- Rod Fyffe’s Southern Cross Tattoo Unveiled At Golden Square Pool
- Local Man’s Saturday Night Out, Dependant On Selling The Drone He Got For Christmas
- Woman Rushed To Emergency After Getting Cheezels Stuck On Fingers
- Local Family Outraged After Discovering Only Yellow Zooper Doopers Are Left
- Eaglehawk Theatre Company to Present: Twelfth Night on the Piss
- Bendigo Council Accidentally Raises NZ Flag
- Powercor Apologises for Swamp Ass
- Man Who Counts Sheep For A Living Falls Asleep on the Job
- Crikey! Coles Launches Vegemite Hot Cross Buns For Australia Day
- KFC Vegan to Open in Castlemaine
- Bendigo’s Oldest Cat Dies at 25 – That’s 117 In Cat Years!
- Woman Burns House Down After Discovering Spider In The Kitchen
- Prince Philip Driving School Closes Doors After 1 Day
- Local Man Sick Of Wife Telling Him Where To Poo
- Prince Philip Driving School Opens In Bendigo
- Local Man’s Day Ruined After Frozen Coke Machine Breaks Down
- Remains Of A Reverse Centaur Found At Lake Neangar
- Bendigo Mallrats Arrested For Being Polite
- The Photocopier Whisperer
- Bendigo Health Takes Part In The 10-Year Challenge
- Pizza ATM Opens At Latrobe Uni
- Bendigo Police Warn Dog Against Leaving Owner In Hot Car
- BREAKING! Bendigo old Lady displays excellent driving skills
- Free Parking! Hasbro Releases Limited Edition Monopoly Bendigo
- Bendigo Is Horny For Roadworks
- Bendigo Trolley Pusher Breaks World Record
- President of Work Social Club Impeached Minutes After Being Elected
- Your Horoscope – Week Of January 14, 2019
- L Plater Drives Car Into Lake Weeroona Doing Bird Box Challenge
- Local Cows Respond By Cooking Deconstructed Human Sausages
- Bunnings To Put The Bizzle In Deconstructed Sausage Sizzles
- Cashier Accidentally Serves Own Mum Buying Condoms
- Expecto Patronum! Sacred Heart Cathedral To Be Transformed Into Hogwarts
- Krispy Kreme Brings Signature Glaze To Bendigo
- Lazy Moe’s To Offer Naked Dining Experience
- Bendigo Have Your Say’s Anthony Butler To Star On I’m A Celebrity…
- Summernats Burnout King Is Eaglehawk Citizen Of The Year
- Castlemaine Paint Vandal Revealed As Banksy
- Local Man Angry Santa Didn’t Deliver Torque Wrench With Bike
- Local Boy Kidsplains To Dad How To Play Fortnite
- Eaglehawk Theatre Company Presents ‘Carrie’
- Mum Jeans Store Opens In Bendigo
- Your Horoscope – Week Of January 6, 2019
- Lynx Releases Smell Of Bendigo Creek
- Elephant At Melbourne Zoo Diagnosed With Peanut Allergy
- 20 People Injured From Leaning On Shovels At Napier St Roadworks Working Bee
- Muzak In Hargreaves Mall To Be Replaced With Ear Splitting Squelch Of A Frightened Pig
- Reminding People It’s Hot Will Cost You Under Tough New VIctorian laws
- 125 Year Old Woman Says Avoiding ‘Bendigo Have Your Say’ Is The Secret To A Long And Healthy Life
- Kangaroo Flat Man Plans Extra Shits After Buying Tower Of Toilets At Aldi
- Monster Redfin Spotted At Lake Eppalock
- VicRoads Asks Public To Finish The Napier St Roadworks
- Carlton Currently Undefeated In 2019
- Alien Space Monkey Pirates Attack Bendigo
- Our Guide On What To Do This New Year’s Eve
- Top Ten Places To Vomit In Bendigo
- Kangaroo Flat To Get A New Wave Pool
- Man ln Intensive Care After Refusing To Stop Saying ‘Nice Garry’ At The MCG
- Apocalypse Hits Bendigo
- Dad Barely Survives Horror Day At The Boxing Day Sales
- VCE Dux Blows Off Law Degree To Become A Full Time YouTuber
- Person Asking “Can I Help?” Secretly Doesn’t Want To Help At All
- Dad Not Looking Forward To Sitting At The Kids Table At The Family Christmas Lunch
- Long Gully Lights To Be Used For Qantas Approach Landing System
- Woman Looses Hair Tie. Keeps Partying. YOLO.
- Karl Stefanovic Announced As The New Host Of ‘Good Morning Bendigo’
- The Bendigo Standard Is Now Digitally Halal Certified
- Exclusive: Leprechauns Say Rainbows Don’t Taste Like Skittles
- New Survey Results Reveal Bendigonians Were Conceived On Mickey Mouse Hill
- Wife Divorces Husband After He Won’t Stop Farting In Bed
- Your Horoscope – Week Of December 17, 2018
- Possessed Pothole In Napier St Roadworks Swallows Man’s Car
- Bouncy Castle At Christmas Church Picnic Blows Away With 8 People Inside
- Local Man Robbed Of Single Use Bags From His Home
- 12 Year Old Boy Finally Shaves Movember Moustache Off
- Man Goes Camping, Hopes World Is Destroyed While Away
- Boss Hints He Has Too Many Coffee Mugs To Potential Secret Santa
- Santa To Get Police Escort Through Long Gully
- Teacher At Christian School Fired For Refusing To Say Merry Christmas
- Bendigo Brave American Import Scores On The Court And At Star Bar
- Shopping Trolleys Form Conga Line To Escape Supermarket
- Flights To Bendigo Cheaper Than A Bondi Beach Car Park
- First Person To Book Flight From Bendigo To Sydney Celebrates With Amelia Earhart Tattoo
- Woman Who Missed Out On $1.50 McFlurry Wonders What’s The Point Of Living Anymore
- Your Horoscope – Week Of December 10, 2018
- V/line Trains To Be Replaced With Elmore Miniature Railway Trains During Heat Restrictions
- ALERT: Bendigo Quarantined Inside A Giant Dome After Man Flu Outbreak
- Fat Shaming Knickers the Cow Raises Steaks
- Ballarat Santa’s Confess They Hate Your Kids
- “Napier Street Road Works Are God’s Punishment For Allowing The Mosque” Says Local Woman
- Your Horoscope – Week Of December 3, 2018
- Santa Financially Stricken
- Riot Squad Called After A Red Cordial Party Gets Out Of Hand
- Bendigo Mourns Abandoned Couch
- McDonald’s To Kill Off The McFlurry
- World’s First Butthole Transplant A Success After Man Eats 50 KFC Wicked Wings
- Local Man Can’t Wait To Rock Out To Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas
- Local Man Gets Beard Caught In Marketplace Travelator
- Your Horoscope – Week Of November 26, 2018
- Locals Fail To Vote After Getting Stuck In Napier St Road Works Traffic Jam
- Amish Rights Activists Blamed For Power Outages
- City Sends Well Wishes To Woman Quitting Facebook
- Families To Embrace A Vegan Christmas After Chicken Truck Embraces Bridge
- Local Man Ditches Mates To Watch Tim Cahill’s Last Game On A Superior Screen
- Local Man Donates Human Liver To Pig
- Local Man Unable to Return Movies To Roundabout Video
- Tuckerbag To Join The Push For Golden Square Mega Market
- Your Horoscope – Week Of November 19, 2018
- Eaglehawk Reebok’s Officially Released
- Local Swingers Misinterpret Bendigo Swap Meet
- Local Man Celebrates 40th Swap Meet But Still Knows Bugger All About Cars
- Evil Genius Captures Giant Heart in Bendigo And Ties It To The Ground For Ransom
- Woman At Work Accidentally Selects Herself As Secret Santa
- BREAKING: Giggle & Hoot Cancelled. Hoot The Owl’s Dark Past Revealed
- Epsom Road Works Joins Great Wall of China As Only Man Made Structure Visible From The Moon
- TAFE To Offer Course On How To Eat A Bunnings Snag
- Eaglehawk Town Hall To Be Demolished For A Costco
- Rod Fyffe’s Hair To Serve As Mayor
- Long Gully Rapper Learns He Ain’t As Cool As He Thought He Was
- 29 Year Old Potter Fan Still Waiting For Letter From Hogwarts
- Kangaroo Flat Bus Evacuated After Woman Farts
- Local Apprentice Questions Naming of Blues And Roots Festival
- Your Horoscope – Week Of November 12, 2018
- Ballarat To Merge With Bendigo
- Blues & Roots Festival Not As Sad or Sexy As Name Suggests
- Struggle To Sell Creepy Bookends
- Crisis As Hair Tie Found On Ground
- Bendigo Oh-God-Why-Am-I-Doing-This Run Takes Place
- Parents Told They Are Adopted
- Local Sign Misunderstands the Meaning of the Word Hour
- Local man Baffled by Point of Signs along Roadside.
- Pinch And Punch For First Day Of The Month Ends In Bloody Mess
- Carpet Bizarre Store still going out of Business Baffles Scientists
- Pantomime Horse Wins Bendigo Cup AND Fashions On The Field
- The Bendigo Cup Form Guide
- Local Man Gets Arm Replaced With Claw Machine Claw
- Young Girl Trapped Inside Cage to Celebrate the Coming of Summer
- Exclusive: Number 42 Identified As King Of The Bins
- Exam Advice From the Bendigo Standard
- Poo Evacuates New Kangaroo Flat Pool
- Melbourne Has Trams Now Too
- Victoria’s First Heroin Parlour to Open in Bendigo
- Crate Man Announced As The Next Bachelor
- La Trobe Uni Student’s Study Habit Borders On The Insane
- New Eaglehawk Children’s Playground Has One Major Drawback
- The Movie Twins Is Being Remade Using An Emu And A Kiwi Bird
- Tree Change People Mostly Worried About Zombies
- Bendigo Decides God is Vengeful
- Eaglehawk Resident Doesn’t Care For Other Grand Final
- Kangaroo Flat Woman Brags About Not Using Gym Membership
- Epsom Woman Believes Can of Coke Tastes Better Than Bottle of Coke
- School Girl Wishes Magpies Would Swoop Teacher
- Ironbark Definitely a Place, says “Ironbark” Resident
- Top 5 Free Carparks Around Bendigo CBD. Number Four Will Amaze You
- Scoop: It’s Not Actually Called Lansell Plaza Anymore
- Bendigo Council to dig up mall again for no good reason
- Old Man Still Hates Doing 50km/h
- Bendigo Discovers Cocaine Was Just on Their Door Step
- Castlemaine Rock Found in Epsom
- White Night Not As Popular As White Knights
- Local Woman Thought Adult Book Week Was A Thing
- K-mart Overtakes Post Office as Local Point of Reference
- Man Jumps on Richmond Bandwagon As They’re Not As Crap Now
- World Heritage Listing Considered For Bendigo’s Telstra Phone Booth
- Bendigo On the Slops Kicks Off
- Beer Wankers Replace Wine Wankers as Most Annoying Wankers
- Local Man Buys Mop From Bunnings To Clean Up Lib Spill
- Crate Man to Challenge for the Leader of Australia
- Local Teen Gets Coles Mini’s Stuck In His Butt
- Bendigo Bank Still Better Than Bank of Melbourne
- Strathfieldsaye Man Convinced Blood Donations Go Straight to Vampires
- Your Horoscope – Week Of August 20, 2018
- Meteorologist Suggests The Weather Needs To Sort It’s Crap Out
- Jimmy Barnes Plays Goldmines Hotel
- Local Man Angry There’s No Bunnings In Eaglehawk
- Bendigo’s first pro lotto player
- Less Spew Outside Elmore Memorial Hall Than Expected
- Long Gully Publican Calls Last Drinks After 1 Day
- Your Horoscope – Week Of August 6, 2018
- Your Horoscope – Week Of July 30, 2018
- TV Reporter Visibly Sick at Having to Talk About Donald Trump
- Man Finds Way To Eat Banana In A Non-Sexy Way
- Bendigo Man Eats Own Head
- Hipster Crushed To Death By Own Man Bun
- Your Horoscope – Week Of July 24, 2017
- Bendigo Standard Investigates the Eye Thingy Fake News Stuff
- Storm Shakes Bendigo Man’s House and Makes Him Wish He Bought a More Expensive House
- Your Horoscope – Week Of July 17, 2017
- Bendigo To Host John-Jacob Jingleheimer-Schmidt Convention
- Bendigo Man Finishes Everything On Netflix
- Moron Gets Stuck In House Of Mirrors
- Self-employed Woman Gets Herself In Her Office Secret Santa
- Newspaper Clarifies Skateboarders Are Not Actually Spewing
- Star struck lovers, you’ll never believe their amazing story!
- Even Shit Babies Proven To Be Cute
- Zaphod Beeblebrox Campaigns for American Presidency
- Bendigo Sads ‘n’ Orgies Festival Considers Name Change
- Quarry hill Man Ineexplicably Popular On Tinder
- Man Tells Yo Mamma Jokes For No Apparent Reason
- Woman Dissuades Couple From Buying a Chicken in Golden Square
- “Concern for the future” Bendigo – Back In My Day Association
- Dog Dresses as Cat for a Birthday
- Mature Age Student Excited By Lozenge in Gift Bag
- Man Confuses Pokemon Go for Tinder
- Bendigo Orienteering Squad Aiming for Gold
- From the Archives: Marriage Equality Complaint Letter
- Scientists Prove Running on a Treadmill Doesn’t Make You Go Anywhere
- What’s Next For Marilyn?
- G’rilled Serving Mesculin Confuses Man Seeking Mescaline
- Benexit Campaign Officially Launched
- Teenager At Shamrock Hotel Talks About Elephant in Room
- 3 Injured In Lightsaber and Nunchuck Fight
- Barista or Soccer Player?
- Golden Square Man Looks For Positives in Girlfriend Moving In With Him
- Milk Prices Set to Soar: Industry Insider Says
- Marilyn Monroe Statue To Be Replaced With Rod Fyffe
- Actual Halloween Goes Past Unnoticed
- Beards of Bendigo
- Supermarket’s New Milk Pricing Policy Sent to Encourage Consumers to Shoot the Baby Themselves
- Young Indian Children Found Working in Bendigo Mine
- New Artisan Restaurant to Open in Bendigo
- Bendigo Winemakers Festival Aims to Avoid Beer Wankers
- Big Green Thing Goes Missing.
- Top Tips for an Alternative Groovin the Moo
- Ex-Bendigo mayor Peter Cox apologises for Depp and Heard Video
- Melbourne Man Gives Lecture in Bendigo on How to Make a Proper Coffee
- Secret Revealed: Bendigo Founded on Fools Gold
- UPF: “We Hate Puppies and Kittens”
- New Non-deadly creature found in Bendigo
- Long Gully P-Plater Caught Doing Speed Limit
- “More Twisted Than A Topknot” – Pho’lis
- Hipster Rally: not in my town say locals
- Hipsters March for Peace
- Giant Marilyn Monroe Statue to be Replaced by Giant Ice Addict
- Rod Fyffe’s Hair Revealed to be Made of Noodles
- Live 10 – The Sound Of Music
- First Bendigonian Travels To Sun At Night
- Iron Jock Title 2016
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