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Home Life & Style Relationships

Bendigo Community Health Service Provides Free Condoms for Aged Care Homes

28 August 2023
in Relationships
Bendigo Community Health Service Provides Free Condoms for Aged Care Homes

In a move that will make all the grandkids raise their eyebrows, the Bendigo Community Health Service has generously distributed free condoms to local aged care homes. Because, you know, who says seniors can’t have a little adventure in their golden years?

“We realized our aging population might be feeling a tad left out when it comes to the modern dating scene,” says spokesperson April McNeil. “What better way to spice up the shuffleboard court than by encouraging some Mclovin’?”

Local seniors are reportedly delighted by the initiative, with many already practising their best winks and smiles in anticipation of newfound romantic prospects. “It’s like high school all over again,” quipped 85-year-old Ethel Thompson, adjusting her bifocals suggestively.

Bendigo’s aged care facilities now offer a range of “mature-themed” condom designs featuring motifs such as walkers and dentures. One might wonder if bingo night will ever be the same.

Residents have reportedly responded with a mixture of bemusement and mild embarrassment. “It’s been decades since I’ve used one of these contraptions,” one resident chuckled. “But I suppose it’s good to know that even at my age, there’s still a chance for a fiery romance in the card-playing corner.”

So, kudos to you, Bendigo Community Health Service, for making sure that our elderly can enjoy their twilight years with a bang – quite literally.

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