Steve Stevenson, a local dad and self-proclaimed bearer of inconvenient truths, dropped a bombshell at the family dinner table last night while his family watched Bondi Vet.
With a nonchalant expression that could only be described as “emotionally detached,” Steve solemnly declared, “You know those animals? Yeah, they’re all dead now.”
The once-beloved family TV show that brought joy to living rooms across the nation has now become a breeding ground for existential crises among the younger generation. As the shockwaves reverberated through the Stevenson household, Steve continued his revelation with all the sentiment of a rock.
Little Sam Stevenson, aged 3, reportedly clutched his stuffed koala, Sir Fluffington, as if he had just realised the fragility of life itself. “But Dad, what about Mr Whiskers the Cat? He was my favourite!”
Steve nodded stoically, never one to shy away from the harsh realities of life. “Mr Whiskers is probably chasing butterflies in that great litter box in the sky now. Life’s a rollercoaster, son.”
The Bendigo Standard reached out to Dr Chris Brown to comment on the shocking revelation. Still, he was too busy promoting his new show, “Bondi Vet: Where Are They Meow?” featuring the ghosts of dearly departed pets haunting the beaches of Bondi.
In the aftermath of this earth-shattering disclosure, the Stevenson family is left to grapple with the harsh truths of mortality. Steve, however, remains unfazed, with plans to reveal next week that he is Santa Claus.
It seems the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, or in this case, it doesn’t fall far from the dead tree on Bondi Vet.
