Bendigo locals Emma and Tom Johnson welcomed a beautiful baby into the world without bombarding your news feed with 547 baby photos.
The daring couple reportedly committed the unthinkable act of enjoying a major life event without sharing it with their 900 closest Facebook acquaintances.
“I can’t believe they didn’t grace us with a 3 AM hospital selfie and a detailed live stream of the entire birthing process,” remarked one bewildered neighbour.
Friends and family were left in utter shock, forced to imagine the baby’s first steps and gummy smiles without the aid of an excessive online slideshow.
The Johnsons, seemingly unapologetic for this gross oversight, remain unavailable for comment, presumably too busy enjoying their private moments in real life.
Stay tuned as we monitor the scandalous journey of Emma and Tom, the couple who dared to keep their baby off your timeline.
