Bendigo Man Eats Own Head

“Tastes like chicken,” reported Megan Fox, translating for her husband Mark Fox, 24, from Strathfieldsaye.

It started as a bet, as these things do, when on an end of season footy trip a teammate of Mark’s at the Strathfieldsaye Jaguar Sharks challenged him to eat his hat.

“Apparently Mark then said, something like, ‘What, you reckon i wont! Put in another five and I’ll eat my ear!’ or something like that, it’s really hard to understand him these days.”

Megan first met Mark two years ago at the Star Bar, and it was love at first sight.

“I really liked his cheek bones… apparently he did too.”

After consuming the hat and ear, other teammates encouraged Mark to eat other bits on his head, such as his nose, eye lids, and a pencil he was chewing.

“They put quite a pot together, apparently it covered beers for the night and a parma, not that Mark needed to eat more after he finished with his cerebral cortex.”

Devouring his primary thought function didn’t prevent Mark from munching away at other lobes and skull fragments.

“They agreed he could skip his hair, so that’s a good thing. Eating hair is yuck,” said Mrs Fox.

With the top part of his cranium consumed, Mark’s friends helped him by chipping away his teeth and dropping them down his gullet.

“Everyone says it was a real team bonding experience, apparently like doing Kokoda or starting a small business.”

The lower mandible was next, having to be pureed into a liquid and poured down his open throat.

“I now feed him though the opening,” said Mrs Fox. “He likes a mixture of milk, corn and bourbon.”

Mark’s teammates had the good sense to leave most of the brain stem intact and cauterize the wounds.

“It wont grow back apparently, but doctors say he can function on basic impulses, like he can walk into things and breathe and he can shit pretty much anywhere now, when before he had to come home because he was afraid of public toilets.”

A midfielder with a high disposal rate, Mark was said to have a good head on his shoulders.

“They don’t say that about him anymore,” said Megan.

Pictures of Mark and his amazing headless body can be purchased by following this link: Mark and His Amazing Headless Body Dot Com

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