Dai Gum Loong has graciously stepped down as the main attraction at this year’s Easter Fair, making way for the real star—Smaug the Dragon.
The mythical creature, known for hoarding treasures and scorching everything in its path, reportedly negotiated a generous contract involving an endless supply of gold coins and a lair.
Local authorities are consulting with Middle Earth diplomats to ensure the safe return of Dai Gum Loong, who is rumoured to be on an extended vacation in the Lonely Mountain. The Easter Fair Committee, however, remains unfazed, insisting that Smaug’s fiery antics are just what the event needed to spice up its annual traditions.
The city plans to build a giant golden nest to house Smaug’s colossal treasure hoard in preparation for the event. Parade-goers will be encouraged to bring their shiny trinkets, baubles and vape pens to contribute to the collection and appease the fearsome creature.
Bendigo City Council has not commented on whether Smaug’s inclusion will increase insurance premiums for the parade.
After the parade, Smaug will retire to the Central Deborah Gold Mine.
Parade-goers are asked to BYO marshmallows.
