• Home
  • Our History
  • Contact
  • Random
Thursday, January 21, 2021
26 °c
Bendigo
Bendigo Standard News
  • News
    • All
    • Bendigo News
    • Law & Order
    • National News
    • Politics
    • World News

    Trump Hires Sweaty Law Expert Dennis Denuto

    Bendigo Council Elections A Shambles. America: “Hold My Beer”

    Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum

    Church Of Scientology Brings Love To Universal Nightclub

    Bendigo Council’s Self Respect Discovered Under Rubble

    Mask Horror! Eaglehawk Woman Sets Own Face On Fire Lighting A Durry

    Council Shuts Down 6 Year Old’s Marijuana Stand For Not Having A Permit

    Grown Adult Still Traumatised By Faceless Doll In 90’s Kids Show

    Dan Andrews Reveals Ring Of Steel Is Just A Giant Egg Ring

  • Bendi-Life
    • All
    • Fashion
    • Health
    • Horoscopes
    • Humans of Bendigo
    • Money
    • Parenting
    • Relationships
    • Travel
    • What's On

    Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum

    Council Shuts Down 6 Year Old’s Marijuana Stand For Not Having A Permit

    Dan Andrews Reveals Ring Of Steel Is Just A Giant Egg Ring

    Melbournians Urged to Stay The Fork Away From Bendigo

    Moama Man Drives To Dubbo Dan Murphy’s After Being Denied Entry To Echuca

    Bendigo Airport Offers Fake Flights For Sydney-Starved Tourists

    Local COVID-19 Patients Quarantined On Lake Tom Thumb Island

    Person Goes To Mickey Mouse Hill For The View

    Father Of Three Asks, “Is It Wednesday?”

  • Entertainment
    • All
    • Movies
    • Music
    • TV

    Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum

    Grown Adult Still Traumatised By Faceless Doll In 90’s Kids Show

    Brendan Fraser Signs On For “Pre-Covid Man”

    10 Albums That Impacted The Bendigo Standard

    Dad Refers To Groovin The Moo As ‘Groovin To The Moo’

    Bendi-Con Cosplayer Dressed As Dr Manhattan Arrested By Police, Told To Put Pants On

    Channel 10 Begins Filming I’m From Bong Gully… Get Me Out Of Here ya ****!

    Tramspotting Screening at the Star Cinema

    Great Scott! Rod Fyffe Cast As Doc Brown In Upcoming Back To The Future Remake

  • Food + Drink

    Hoarder Cocktail Night Recipes: Hand Sanitizer And Cola, And More

    Hoarder Fashion: Pasta Necklaces Are In This Year!!!!

    Local Man To Take Part In Eating In Bed Olympics

    Darrell Lea To Release The Taste Of Bendigo

    Local Man Gives Three Thumbs Up To Bendigo’s Smallest Parma

    Local Man Fired For Putting Communal Sauce In The Fridge

    Local Man Discovers You Can’t Get Naked At Get Naked Espresso Bar

    “Babyccino’s Are Gateway to Caffeine Addiction” Says Local Mum

    Is Buddy Giving Two Up Yours or Two Thumbs Up? You Be The Judge

  • Technology

    5G Causes Tim Reuben To Leave Hit FM

    Parents On Laptops Complain About Kids On Tablets

    COVIDsafe App Not As Fun or Security Flawed As FaceApp

    Zoom Replaces Excel As Most Hated Workplace App

    Cat Fails To Search For Coronavirus Cure

    Local Man Records Sound Of Fart

    Local Man creates Bendigo Have Your Say app

    Local unsure if ‘Bendigo Lifts 4 Cash’ is for drug deals or booty calls

    Local Influencers Apply For Centrelink After Instagram Goes Down

  • Sport

    Most Complicated Hopscotch Ever Produced

    Anakin Skywalker Declares Coronavirus Is “Not Podracing”

    Local Man To Take Part In Eating In Bed Olympics

    AFL Suggests Putting Zip Ties On Your Helmet To Prevent Magpie Attacks During Finals

    Hawthorn Announces New Mascots

    Right Up Your Alley: S#!*ty Bowling Launches In Bendigo

    Kangaroo Sets Sights On Anthony Mundine After Enrolling In Boxing Class

    Bendigo Trolley Pusher Breaks World Record

    Carlton Currently Undefeated In 2019

No Result
View All Result
  • News
    • All
    • Bendigo News
    • Law & Order
    • National News
    • Politics
    • World News

    Trump Hires Sweaty Law Expert Dennis Denuto

    Bendigo Council Elections A Shambles. America: “Hold My Beer”

    Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum

    Church Of Scientology Brings Love To Universal Nightclub

    Bendigo Council’s Self Respect Discovered Under Rubble

    Mask Horror! Eaglehawk Woman Sets Own Face On Fire Lighting A Durry

    Council Shuts Down 6 Year Old’s Marijuana Stand For Not Having A Permit

    Grown Adult Still Traumatised By Faceless Doll In 90’s Kids Show

    Dan Andrews Reveals Ring Of Steel Is Just A Giant Egg Ring

  • Bendi-Life
    • All
    • Fashion
    • Health
    • Horoscopes
    • Humans of Bendigo
    • Money
    • Parenting
    • Relationships
    • Travel
    • What's On

    Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum

    Council Shuts Down 6 Year Old’s Marijuana Stand For Not Having A Permit

    Dan Andrews Reveals Ring Of Steel Is Just A Giant Egg Ring

    Melbournians Urged to Stay The Fork Away From Bendigo

    Moama Man Drives To Dubbo Dan Murphy’s After Being Denied Entry To Echuca

    Bendigo Airport Offers Fake Flights For Sydney-Starved Tourists

    Local COVID-19 Patients Quarantined On Lake Tom Thumb Island

    Person Goes To Mickey Mouse Hill For The View

    Father Of Three Asks, “Is It Wednesday?”

  • Entertainment
    • All
    • Movies
    • Music
    • TV

    Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum

    Grown Adult Still Traumatised By Faceless Doll In 90’s Kids Show

    Brendan Fraser Signs On For “Pre-Covid Man”

    10 Albums That Impacted The Bendigo Standard

    Dad Refers To Groovin The Moo As ‘Groovin To The Moo’

    Bendi-Con Cosplayer Dressed As Dr Manhattan Arrested By Police, Told To Put Pants On

    Channel 10 Begins Filming I’m From Bong Gully… Get Me Out Of Here ya ****!

    Tramspotting Screening at the Star Cinema

    Great Scott! Rod Fyffe Cast As Doc Brown In Upcoming Back To The Future Remake

  • Food + Drink

    Hoarder Cocktail Night Recipes: Hand Sanitizer And Cola, And More

    Hoarder Fashion: Pasta Necklaces Are In This Year!!!!

    Local Man To Take Part In Eating In Bed Olympics

    Darrell Lea To Release The Taste Of Bendigo

    Local Man Gives Three Thumbs Up To Bendigo’s Smallest Parma

    Local Man Fired For Putting Communal Sauce In The Fridge

    Local Man Discovers You Can’t Get Naked At Get Naked Espresso Bar

    “Babyccino’s Are Gateway to Caffeine Addiction” Says Local Mum

    Is Buddy Giving Two Up Yours or Two Thumbs Up? You Be The Judge

  • Technology

    5G Causes Tim Reuben To Leave Hit FM

    Parents On Laptops Complain About Kids On Tablets

    COVIDsafe App Not As Fun or Security Flawed As FaceApp

    Zoom Replaces Excel As Most Hated Workplace App

    Cat Fails To Search For Coronavirus Cure

    Local Man Records Sound Of Fart

    Local Man creates Bendigo Have Your Say app

    Local unsure if ‘Bendigo Lifts 4 Cash’ is for drug deals or booty calls

    Local Influencers Apply For Centrelink After Instagram Goes Down

  • Sport

    Most Complicated Hopscotch Ever Produced

    Anakin Skywalker Declares Coronavirus Is “Not Podracing”

    Local Man To Take Part In Eating In Bed Olympics

    AFL Suggests Putting Zip Ties On Your Helmet To Prevent Magpie Attacks During Finals

    Hawthorn Announces New Mascots

    Right Up Your Alley: S#!*ty Bowling Launches In Bendigo

    Kangaroo Sets Sights On Anthony Mundine After Enrolling In Boxing Class

    Bendigo Trolley Pusher Breaks World Record

    Carlton Currently Undefeated In 2019

The Bendigo Standard
No Result
View All Result

Groovin the Moo: Pill Tester Has Big Day On The Job

Luke Morris by Luke Morris
May 4, 2019
in Bendigo News

“Does anyone else worry about the person testing all those pills?” asked Susan Citizen via Facebook. “I mean, I know they’re only taking a little sample but after a full day that’s got to take its toll.”

The Bendigo Standard listened to Susan and tracked down smack daddy Pill Tester Steven Stevenson for an interview.

“It’s not a bad job,” said Mr Steveson. “It’s mostly weekend work and you get to travel. Plus there’s some good gear out there.”

The role of Pill Tester is now hotly contest, but when Mr Steveson started it wasn’t hard to apply.

“I was at Centrelink and filled out the application just to put it in the Job Search Diary as a bluff but then I got it,” said Mr Steveson. “Biggest shock to the system since that pikachu tagged pill I had in Malmsbury last winter.”

However, like every job, there are highs and lows.

“I mean obviously the lows are the next two days after a festival when the serotonin has been burnt out of the system and needs to rebuild, but some of the highs have been, well this one time I was asked to work at an adult night in Frankston and I tested so many blue pills my dick was hard for three days,” said Mr Steveson.

Unfortunately this weekend in Bendigo the role of Pill Tester has not been grated official permission.

“Which means I’ll be running freelance out of toilet cubical five from the main stage, just to stop those kiddies from munching and crunching hard,” said Mr Steveson.

It might sound dodgy to operate a medical advice service less than a metre from septic waste, but as Mr Stevenson says, “Since these children don’t know what they’re doing I might as well step in and help, try before they die, sort of giving the kids some safety pads and helmet before someone crashes in secret.”

Heros don’t always wear capes.

Share75Tweet
Previous Post

Unvaccinated Banned From Groovin The Moo

Next Post

Local Man Sues Hundreds-and-Thousands Believing Only 274 Exist

Related Posts

Trump Hires Sweaty Law Expert Dennis Denuto

November 30, 2020

Bendigo Council Elections A Shambles. America: “Hold My Beer”

November 3, 2020

Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum

November 2, 2020

Church Of Scientology Brings Love To Universal Nightclub

November 2, 2020
Bendigo News

Bendigo Council’s Self Respect Discovered Under Rubble

October 29, 2020

Mask Horror! Eaglehawk Woman Sets Own Face On Fire Lighting A Durry

October 27, 2020
Load More

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published.

This Just In

  • Trump Hires Sweaty Law Expert Dennis Denuto
  • Bendigo Council Elections A Shambles. America: “Hold My Beer”
  • Scottish Vets Neuter Prime Possum
  • Church Of Scientology Brings Love To Universal Nightclub
  • Bendigo Council’s Self Respect Discovered Under Rubble
  • Mask Horror! Eaglehawk Woman Sets Own Face On Fire Lighting A Durry
  • Council Shuts Down 6 Year Old’s Marijuana Stand For Not Having A Permit
  • Grown Adult Still Traumatised By Faceless Doll In 90’s Kids Show
  • Dan Andrews Reveals Ring Of Steel Is Just A Giant Egg Ring
  • No Free Parking? Bendigo Councillors Added To Santa’s Naughty List
Facebook Twitter Instagram

The Bendigo Standard

About Us

The Bendigo Standard is Bendigo's most popular free news service.

We pride ourselves in reporting the news that matters, doesn't matter and the news you didn't realise mattered until you read it.

Subscribe And Win At Life

Enter your email address to subscribe and receive notifications of new posts by email.

© 2020 The Bendigo Standard

No Result
View All Result
  • News
  • Bendi-Life
  • Entertainment
  • Food + Drink
  • Technology
  • Sport
  • Our History
  • Contact
  • Shop
  • Random
  • Suggestion Box

© 2020 The Bendigo Standard