Local News
Groovin The Moo Unleashes Brown Note, Neighbours Devastated by Uncontrollable Bowel Movements
Groovin The Moo has inadvertently weaponised sound in an unprecedented turn of events. Neighbours are left crying "foul" as they experience the Brown Note,...
Unidentified Substance Found in Groovin The Moo’s Water Supply, Turns Out to Be Glitter
In a bizarre turn of events, the Groovin The Moo's water supply was contaminated with an unidentified substance. After extensive testing, it was determined...
Groovin The Moo Festivalgoer Overdoses on Good Vibes, Taken to Hospital
In a shocking turn of events, a Groovin The Moo festivalgoer was rushed to the hospital after overdosing on good vibes. Witnesses say the...
Groovin The Moo’s Porta-Loos Named Bendigo’s Cleanest Toilets
Porta-loos at Groovin The Moo (GTM) festival has been named Bendigo's cleanest toilets. This prestigious title was granted by "Superior Hygienic Innovation in Toilets"...
“Can Anyone Smell Weed Around Pall Mall?” Locals Demand Answers
In a bewildering turn of events, residents of Pall Mall are scratching their heads and noses, sniffing the air with suspicion. An enigmatic scent...
Bendigo Pottery Unveils Chic Chamber Pots; Trendsetters Rush to Replace Their Toilets
Australia's oldest working pottery has left the ceramics world flushed with excitement. They've announced the launch of a new line of designer chamber pots,...
Study Finds People Who Ride Mobility Scooters Don’t Know Footpaths Actually Exist
In a groundbreaking study released today, researchers have discovered that a shocking number of mobility scooter users appear to be utterly oblivious to the...
“Groovin the Pew”: Holy Spirits Ignite Christian Music Festival
The Bendigo Standard reports that thousands of devout partygoers attended the inaugural Groovin the Pew festival this past weekend, a Christian alternative of the...
Grandparents Continue The Tradition Of Making Their House Smell Weird
In a tradition passed down through generations, grandparents across the country make their houses smell weird again, much to the confusion and disgust of...
Man Found Living In The Rosalind Park Kaleidoscope, Claims He’s Just Another Reflection
Eaglehawk resident Jim Reeves was discovered Tuesday after spending an astonishing three weeks lost in Rosalind Park's infamous Kaleidoscope. Despite Mr Reeves' insistence that...