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Man Who Married Horse Saddles Up As Jerry Springer’s Pallbearer

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In a sad turn of events, the man who famously married his horse on “The Jerry Springer Show” has been chosen as a pallbearer for the legendary TV host’s funeral. Springer, who passed away at 79, made sure to have his most unforgettable guests attend his send-off.

Among the unusual attendees was a woman who’d confessed to stealing her twin sister’s identity to sleep with her husband and a man whose life ambition was to be a human couch. Also present was the iconic woman who ate her hair, now proudly sporting a wig made from her excess hairballs.

The horse groom, whose name has been withheld to protect his dignity, tearfully carried the casket alongside his beloved mare, who wore a chic black veil in honour of the occasion. The couple, who had been living happily ever after since their appearance on the show, shared that Springer had played a significant role in bringing them together and legitimizing their love.

To honour Springer’s memory, attendees engaged in a live “Jerry Springer” style debate, moderated by the ghost of Springer himself, courtesy of a psychic guest who claimed to be his long-lost half-sister. The debate quickly turned chaotic as audience members cheered and chanted “Jerry! Jerry!” before hurling chairs across the room.

In a touching tribute, the horse groom and his equine wife left a bouquet of hay and carrots on Springer’s grave, leaving no doubt that the show’s spirit will live on forever.

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